Just some random thoughts...

Though the books will be around forever, the movie franchise of Harry Potter is now over.  It feels like the end of an era to me.  Much like when your favorite show is given the chance to have a final episode, for me that was LOST.  I liked the final movie.  It was well done and kept in all the essentials.  It was a little slow at first because the viewer had to remember where they left off in the first part of Harry Potter 7, but once that first part was done, the rest of the movie was great. :)

I cried at the end, not because it was sad, but because it was over.  Finito, Done.  No more movies to be made and have masses of people around the world sitting in a movie theater at midnight when they should probably be sleeping because they have to be to work by 8 or 9 am the next morning.

And now I have a confession to make.  I only owned book 6 and 7 of Harry Potter for a very long time.  After Jason and I were finally able to go see the final movie this last Sunday because I was finally feeling like I could leave the house for a little while, I went across the street from the theater to Barnes & Noble and bought the rest of the books.  So now I can read them whenever I want.  YAY me!  And even though I hated the 5th and 6th movies, I feel compelled to go and buy them.  I'm not sure why, I suppose it is the complete the series mentality, but also for nostalgia and so our future children can watch them when they are old enough and get into Harry Potter.  Kind of like the Lord of the Rings books and movies and yes, for me also Twilight (yes it is a guilty pleasure so just smile, nod and let it go. ;)) 

Anyway, I started reading another of Alison Weir's novels.  This one is about Eleanor of Aquitaine and frankly I am only 13 pages into it and want to stop reading it and start reading the Harry Potter series again instead.  That is how unimpressed I am with the book I am reading.  This is not a slam again Harry Potter, it's just that once I commit to reading a book, I feel obligated to finish it, even if it sucks.  It is disappointing because I read Alison Weir's non-fiction biography of Eleanor of Aquitaine and it was fantastic.  I wish the woman would just stick to what she is good at and write non-fiction.  I did read another one of her novels called "The Lady Elizabeth" which was pretty good, but then I read her non-fiction "The Children of Henry VIII" which she must have based the novel on because a lot of the same stuff was in both. 

Jason is working on his sermon for tomorrow morning right now and I am slowly getting caught up on my TIME magazine reading, but really waiting for him to take a break so we can watch another episode of Season 1 of LOST.  Yeah, we are starting to rewatch the series which is AWESOME by the way and I just can't get enough. :)  Hopefully soon he will take a break and I can get my fix. :)

Regrouping yet again...

I have been through some pretty craptacular stuff in my life, but last Monday around 4pm was one of the worst days of my life.  Jason and I went to my regular monthly baby check up only to find out that our baby had died, probably sometime during week 11.  At the time of the check up it was almost week 14.  I was then told I would have to have a formal ultrasound the following day to make certain that my doctor was right.  It was a rough night of making many phone calls to family and close friends.  Earlier on Monday, Jason and I finally decided to make an announcement on facebook about our pregnancy because we were both very excited and happy.  Now we had to figure out how to make the announcement that we lost the baby. 

It was a long week of going back and forth to Great Falls which is 35 minutes away from Fairfield.  Finally after finding out on Monday that I was carrying our dead baby around inside of me for possibly almost 3 weeks, on Friday early morning I had a D&C.  What's a few more days of anguish and sadness.  After the procedure, I was given some powerful pain medication that made me extremely loopy and gave me insomnia that first night.  I felt no physical pain and no pain in general because I barely knew what was going on around me. 

I forgot to mention, on Monday morning my parent's left to head back to Minnesota after spending a week and a half with us and celebrating Jason's ordination.  After we called them Monday evening, they turned around about 100 miles outside of Bismarck and came back and stayed with us until Saturday morning after my procedure.  Jason's mom also came down and stayed with us until Saturday morning.  It was a God send to have them here with us that whole miserable week. 

Saturday was another rough day, but with the meds I was able to just relax and I spent the whole day reading and sleeping.  Sunday, I skipped church.  I just wasn't ready to face anyone and to talk about what happened.  The two congregations have been amazingly supportive and I am confident that I will be ready to attend church this Sunday.  Sunday we also decided to venture out of the house and go into Great Falls.  We went and saw Harry Potter 7, Part 2 and it was great.  Unfortunately the 2-D version was sold out by the time we got there so we ended up seeing the 3-D one.  Note to self, go see the movie again in 2-D, the 3-D was too dark and I feel like I missed somethings because of it.  Oh darn, having to go see HP7, P2 again, what a shame. ;P

Monday was another stay at home day for me, but in the afternoon in 90 degree heat we went for a walk around town and stopped at one of the local restaurants and had ice cream then walked back.  We started watching LOST from the beginning and are going to slowly make our way through the whole seriese.  Jason stopped watching it for awhile so he has some seasons to catch up on. :)

Yesterday we went up to Choteau, the county seat to get our new MT licenses.  We got there a little after 9:30 and didn't leave until around 2:30.  Their system is antiquated and bullshit.  After waiting forever to get through the line, we got a tour from the Lutheran Pastor in Choteau of the nursing homes there and I joined the library up there, which is something I've wanted to do for awhile. 

Today is another relaxing day.  I am going to go for my daily walking to the high school and find out what I need to do to get my name on the substitute list for this school year and then head over to the local coffee/nail boutique/liquor store to drop off some Mary Kay business cards if there is room for them.  The women who own the local coffee/nail boutique/liquor store belong to one of the churches that Jason is now Pastor of.  They are some really neat ladies!  While I am there I am going to set up an appointment to get a mani/pedi.  After the shit week I had last week, I think I deserve it!

And so now it is time to regroup and begin again.  After my appointment on August 3rd Jason and I will have a better idea of where I am at healing wise physically.  Mentally and emotionally it will be a while before we heal from this tragedy.  But we are also not deterred and when we are ready we will try again to get pregnant and hopefully when it happens again, it will end with a lovely healthy living baby.

I have been through some bad times in my life and this is one of the worst, but because I have been through bad times before, I know that a lot of prayer, a lot of support from family and friends and others, and a lot of time, will eventually make life calm down to the point of being livable again.  For God is always with us in joy and in sorrow and I have faith in that promise, even when it is hard to fathom it.

Two blogs no more

Life has been so hectic lately and it doesn't look like it is going to calm down anytime soon.  So I decided to delete my second blog and just write on this one instead.  Much to update people on, but for now I will just leave it for another time.

My parental units are visiting for a while and they leave Monday morning after Jason's ordination.  Jason's ordination is on Sunday afternoon and he preaches Sunday morning.  It is going to be a great day.

I am going to see the final Harry Potter movie on Monday afternoon after my doctor's appointment.  I can't wait!  I have only read one bad comment about it so far among many fantastic ones. 

More updates to come on Monday when I have more time. 

Good Bye Minnesota! It's been fun!!!

I am no longer a resident of the great state of Minnesota.  We had some wonderful times together.  We had some not so great times together as well.  I will not miss the humid, hot summers and freezing cold winters.  I have moved to a place with my husband Jason that is supposedly more temperate in temperature.  I think that is a big fat lie. 

Last Wednesday, June 15th, Jason and I arrived in Fairfield, Montana, our new home.  Jason has taken a call at Fairfield Lutheran Parishes, which is exciting for us.  So far it has been very pleasant and we are slowly unpacking our crap.  I am going even slower than Jason is.  He won't let me lift any boxes that are not as light as a feather.  This makes it hard when I need to move stuff around to get to my books which are the most important things I feel the need to unpack of course. 

I miss my family and friends like crazy.  The unpacking process is keeping me busy enough right now so I don't have too much time to dwell on it.  If I actually had the time to dwell on it I would just sit and stare at the wall all day depressed.  No time for that though.  Too much to do already. 

I am starting over with my Mary Kay stuff here in Fairfield.  I didn't have time or the inclination to do too much with it when I was still living in the cities.  Now that it is going to take me a while to find a job, unless something miraculously drops into my lap, selling Mary Kay can help supplement my/our income for awhile. 

Sadly I will not be able to walk in this year's 3-Day for the Cure Walk anymore.  Circumstances have it that I just can't physically do it because I overheat so easily and suffer from heat stroke.  In the middle of August when it is hottest in Minnesota is when the walk is, so clearly that is a problem.  So sadly I will have to put it off for another year.  My goal is to try again in two years.  I also need to get better at my fundraising.  This is where selling Mary Kay will help because it will help me be more confident in selling my product, which in the case of the walk is the importance of raising money to help find a cure for breast cancer. 

Things I miss about Minnesota, the twin cities especially are having a movie theater close, having many places to chose from when dining out, the trees (apparently Montana doesn't believe in trees,) and of course my family and friends.  It will take me a while to get used to life here in Montana and I know I will find myself comparing things to Minnesota for a long time to come. 

I will miss you Minnesota!  It's been quite the adventure!

Time at Warp Speed Ahead...

Time lately feels like it is going warp speed ahead.  Despite my utter frustrations with the thesis process and the professors involved, in a week from today I will be defending my thesis to these people.  It has not snuck up on me because I have been waiting for it to happen for a month and some days now.  I am determined to defend my thesis to the death (figuratively of course) so I do not have to make any further changes and can go forth from now on, meeting the appropriate deadlines.

One thing that has snuck up on me though is Jason's first call process.  A few weeks ago, he got a call from the bishop of Montana synod saying she would like him to interview with a two point parish in small town Montana.  This town is called Fairfield and is located 20-25 minutes away from the continental divide of the Rocky Mountains.  The bigger city in the area is Great Falls which is 40 miles East and the county seat is 20 miles or so north. 

Being a city girl, this will be a huge transition for me, but I am more and more excited to start that new adventure, despite the initial anxiety it will cause.  Anyway, a week or so later, he got a call from the assistant to the bishop who is currently leading services at the parishes until they hire a full-time pastor (Jason?!)  Last Thursday the church council and call committee received Jason's name as a candidate to interview for the pastor position and they called him right away to talk to him and figure out when he could go out for said interview.  Jason called them back on Saturday and it looks like we will be heading to Fairfield, MT the last weekend in April for the interview.  They are flying me out as well to be a part of the process which I am happy about.  I've been told that after the interview, the council and call committee will have a vote about Jason and then will extend the vote a few weeks later to the whole congregation.  If they vote yes to hire Jason on as their pastor, they will extend him a call and then things will go from warp speed to chaos.

We are beginning the discussion of when he should start.  We are thinking the middle to last part of June, mostly because we will need time to pack up our crap and move it out to the parsonage in Fairfield.  I am going to be done with my job at the office at the end of May, probably the week before or the week of graduation, which is on the Sunday of Memorial Day weekend. 

Of course, this is all predicated on the fact that Jason is extended a call to this two point parish in Fairfield, but who am I kidding; they'll love him.

Then after graduation if Jason is extended the call, there is his ordination.  And moving.  And saying good-bye to my family and friends who are in Minnesota.  And the 3-Day walk in August with the weekend before being the wedding of two fantastic friends of ours.  And getting a job to pay for student loans and our two dogs.  And learning how to garden and crochet (again.)  And........... Will I ever get to relax?!  Who knows!

So time right now and for the forseeable future is going warp speed ahead captain and I am along for the ride.

These Times are a Changin'

Last night when I got home from work it was still light out!  Awesome! 

I go back and forth on a minute by minute basis about moving to Montana in the near future.  Most of the time I am looking forward to the new adventure and then a few minutes later I become panicked by the idea of being stuck out in the middle of nowhere and unable to find a job.  Mostly I am excited in a good way though.

I have to wait till the week of April 11th to do my oral defense for my thesis, which is about a week and a half later than the April 1st deadline.  I got the okay from the GTE office though, so I'm not going to worry about it.  It means I will have to scrabble to meet the April 15th deadline, but whatever, it's not like I have a job or anything that I can take off time whenever I want and spend the needed hours in the library making corrections on my thesis before April 15th...no, none of that happening here.  Neither am I bitter about it either.  So I throw my hands up in defeat and say fuck it and move on.

Spring is starting to show itself in subtle ways.  This is exciting because if I see another snow flake I might just have to end it all.  (I'm not being serious, just sarcastic.)

I'm keeping myself busy with work and reading for fun, since I have nothing better to do, until the week of April 11th.  I am also keeping up with my walking training for the Susan G. Komen 3-Day for the Cure walk this August in the Twin Cities.  It is going well.  I don't get shin splints anymore, but my ankles sometimes get swollen and my lower back aches as well.  I have looked up some good stretches for both and ice/heat my ankles and lower back when necessary.  Over all it is going well.  This week I am working on walking 13 miles total.  Next week it bumps up to 15.  Apparently walking 14 miles in a week is no longer cool, thus the jump to 15.

This week or next week, not sure, are the last ones that I get Tuesdays and Thursday nights to myself because Jason's night classes are ending.  I adore my husband.  It has been really nice to have some quality time to myself to do whatever I want though.  It will be tough giving that up.  So this Tuesday and Thursday and maybe next week too, I intend to take advantage of that alone time.  Don't get me wrong, I love spending time with my husband, but an introvert needs alone time on occasion.

And so life goes on as usual in the Pollington/Pratola household (also known as the tiny one-bedroom apartment on campus we have survived living together) and it is good. 

Montana here I come....

Jason found out last Friday that we will be heading to Montana for his first call.  At first I was disappointed because I personally was hoping for Washington or Oregon.  I also started to panic about not being able to find a job if we get stuck out in the middle of nowhere.  It all came rushing at me in a few short seconds.  I wanted to cry.

After taking the time to change into my gym clothes and a few more minutes of just staring into space, I decided to stop panicking and instead ask Jason a million questions about Montana.  What were the more populated areas?  Where were the colleges and universities located?  What was the weather like?  Only the answers to my last question sent me into panic mode again for a little while, but luckily by that time we were at the gym and I was able to walk and cycle it off for the most part.

After grilling Jason about Montana all weekend, I have become comfortable with the idea of moving there for a few years.  Of course if we get stuck out in the middle of nowhere that will quickly change.