Reflections and Looking Ahead!

It is the darkest days of the year now, as we say goodbye to one year and begin another.  Funny how we end in the darkness and begin again as the light of the days gets slightly longer.

As I look back on the year of 2019, the word that comes to mind first is quick.  This year has gone by so fast.  As with every year there were moments of great joy and moments of great sorrow.  For whatever reason I am stuck on the great sorrows, yet bursts of joyful moments take over at times as I reflect on the last year of the 2010s.  

Some amazing things have happened in the past decade and in 2019!  To write about them all now would take the length of a book, not a blog post.

Here are some things I have learned in the last year and decade:

• Marriage is not easy or for the faint of heart.  It is 💯 worth the time, effort and love shared, but it is not easy.

• Losing a beloved family member and/or friend never gets any easier.  

• I am resilient and can get through anything by clinging to my faith, being willing to ask for help from my loved ones and not being afraid to seek therapy when I can't handle life.

• Parenting is the best, hardest job ever!  No exceptions!  I have never been more tired, afraid and joy-filled in my life and I wouldn't give up being a parent to my boys for anything!

• Small town, rural America is where it is at folks!  I love being a big city gal, but if you really want to make a difference in the world and people's lives, head to a small town!

• If I don't get between thirty minutes to an hour of alone time each day, I turn into a horrible monster and have a hard time functioning or giving a crap about anything.  This introvert is hardcore y'all!

• Time out with friends and away from my family is important.  Even though I still have that initial pang of guilt every time I leave to go hang out with a friend or a group of people, it energizes me to be around others without my boys around.  I am able to come home from my outing and again enjoy my family.

There is a lot more that I have learned bit this post is already long enough.

I don't do New Year's Resolutions.  I set goals and work on accomplishing them throughout the whole year.  I have set three goals for myself for 2020 to work on the whole year.  I am excited to get started on them and may even begin working on them a little early. 😉

So there you have it.  As we come to the end of a year and a decade, may you have a blessed new year!  

Until next time!

Megan

How I plan ahead

I am a planner gal.  And by planner, I mean a good old fashion paper planner with all the accessories.  In fact, not only do I have a fancy paper planner but I have a mini paper calendar that I bring with me everywhere I go so I know when I can schedule appointments, etc. or meet up with friends and family.  

Having both my fancy planner and my mini calendar helps me keep #allthethings organized for not just myself but my family.  I color code my planner; orange for family schedule, yellow for my husband's and Church events schedule, blue for my schedule, appointments, meetings and other fun things, and pink for my Mary Kay and Thirty One Business goings-on.  My mini calendar contains all the same things as my planner but is easier to bring with me everywhere I go. 

At the beginning of each month, I sit down with my husband for about 10 to 15 minutes and we write down everything we know about at that moment that is going on that month on our joint paper calendar that hangs on a cabinet door in our kitchen so we can always have it to refer to.

Once everything is written down on our joint calendar, I write it all in my fancy Keepsake Planner from Thirty One Gifts, in pencil and then highlight each category with the appropriate color, on the full month spread for that particular month, say December, since that is the month we are in right now.

Once I'm done with filling out the month spread in pencil and highlighters, I move onto each week and only write down #allthethings for two weeks at a time, again in pencil and this time not highlighted because things can change from day to day at a moment's notice, especially being a clergy family; my husband can be called to leave at any moment or have a sudden meeting come up which changes the plan for the day.  But having a good routine in place helps create flexibility too, which may seem counterintuitive.

Setting up my planner and mini calendar for the month and two weeks ahead of time, takes me about an hour.  Yup, all the things I just described above takes me about an hour.  If I can find an hour at the beginning of the month while being a stay-at-home mom and keeping everything going around our home as smoothly as possible, then so can you.  And trust me, making the time to get your monthly schedule organized at the beginning of each month will alleviate a whole lot of stress in the long run.  You will thank yourself for taking the time to do this for yourself and your family, I know I do everyday.

Gluten-Free...

I love all things bread!  Bagels, English muffins, cereal, homemade sandwich thins, pizza, donuts, and any manner of carbtastic desserts!

But lately over the last few months, I have been dealing with some bloating and inflammation, which can be side effects of gallbladder removal.  And so, I am slowly working my way to becoming gluten free.  All signs point to gluten as the irritant, which of course, is devastating for me because of my love for all things carb related.

I am being proactive though and searching for equivalent recipes and products to what I love but gluten free.  I will have to get used to the different taste of the new recipes.  It will be more expensive to make certain things like our homemade bread because we'll have to use an alternative flour source.

In the end though, I know it will be worth it.  It will be worth not having the big inflamed bulge in my stomach and abdominal areas.  It will be worth it to fit in my clothes again and to not feel self-conscious every time I go out in public.  It will be worth it to feel good on the inside again, with less gas build up and aches and pains.

I am making this leap into the unknown for myself so I can feel better in every way possible; so I can be more present for my family and friends and so I can fit into my clothes again!

Wish me luck, as this is going to be hard; one of the hardest things I have done in a long time. 

Until next time!

Megan

What is Light?

As I sit here on the heating radiator in front of one of my dining room windows, I can't help being fascinated by the shadows of the leaves and tree branches playing across the table.

My youngest has caught a gunky sinus cold from who knows what and he is coughing in the background, lounging on our big round chair watching something on his tablet.  That little stinker bought figured out how to buy a movie on Amazon Prime Video on his tablet.  But that is a story for another time.

Back to the light.  What I am using as a devotional each day had a poem about light that I read for yesterday that I want to share with you because it speaks so much to light in our daily lives and God's light given to us by the words of Jesus Christ, through the Holy Spirit.

Poetry can be an amazing vehicle to discuss faith, when given thought and discernment to the words and context of the idea that is being conveyed.  Don't believe me, check out the books of Psalms, Proverbs, Ecclesiastes, Lamentations and if your Bible has it Songs of Solomon.  Each of these biblical books are written in poetic as well a prophetic form.  I encourage you to rummage around in these books when you can take a moment to do so.  They have all kinds of amazing little nuggets about living a daily life of faith in the good and bad times.

May this poem on, For Light, bring light into your life on this Tuesday, September 10th, 2019.

Until Next Time,

Megan

John O'Donohue, To Bless the Space Between Us: A Book of Blessings. Doubleday.  New York, New York.  2008. 15-16.

For Light

Light cannot see inside things.
That is what the dark is for:
Minding the interior,
Nurturing the path of growth
Through places where death
In its own way turns into life.

In the glare of neon times,
Let our eyes not be worn
By surfaces that shine
With hunger made attractive.

That our thoughts may be true light,
Finding their way into words
Which have the weight of shadow
To hold the layers of truth.

That we never place our trust
In minds claimed by empty light,
Where one-sided certainties
Are driven by false desire.

When we look into the heart,
May our eyes have the kindness
And reverence of candlelight.

That the searching of our minds
Be equal to the oblique
Crevices and corners where
The mystery continues to dwell,
glimmering in fugitive light.

When we are confined inside
The dark house of suffering
That moonlight might find a window.

When we become false and lost
That the severe noon-light
Would cast our shadow clear.

When we love, that dawn-light
Would lighten our feet
Upon the waters.

As we grow old, that twilight
Would illuminate treasure
In the fields of memory.

And when we come to search for God,
Let us first be robed in night,
Put on the mind of morning
To feel the rush of light
Spread slowly inside
The color and stillness
Of a world found.

Musings on New Beginnings.....What does that even mean?

I recently started reading a Book of Blessings about different stages and areas of life; a new devotion if you will.  It is called, To Bless the Space Between Us: A Book of Blessings, by John O'Donohue.  He has written quite a few books of poetry based on old Irish ways of thinking and literature and uses them to express ideas about life's journey and ways that blessings play a significant role in our daily lives.

I have recently finished a devotion series using Facebook Messenger to do it as a group with twenty or so ladies.  This devotion was called, 100 Days to Brave, by Annie F. Downs.  After finishing this group devotion over 100 days, I was decided to keep doing a devotion in the mornings to start my day off on a good note.  The rest of the day may suck, but at least I gave myself some time in the morning to get in a decent head space before the chaos of being a stay-at-home mom of two highly sensitive, speech delayed boys.

Today as I started my new devotional series by John O'Donohue, we read about New Beginnings.  New Beginnings are a part of life; they can be joyous and scary at the same time.  And they can be a blessing, depending on the circumstances surrounding said new beginning.

The question he posed at the end of his reflection to this New Beginnings section was this:

What is the new horizon in you that wants to be seen?

This is an significant question for me because it has been something I have asking myself for years.  What IS the new horizon in me that wants to be seen?  Looking back now, thinking about this question, I can see how with each new beginning, each new horizon in my life, there was equal parts excitement and fear of the new; joy and terror in facing the unknown.

I don't know what the new horizon in me that wants to be seen is yet.  I have just accepted after close to 8 and 1/2 years my role of being a wife and mom; not being exactly where I thought I wanted to be at age 37, not fulfilling my calling as a historian, not helping my family out as much financially as I want to be.  I have several fancy Masters degrees that we are paying loans on and I am doing nothing with them right now.  I spend my days working on potty training our 3 - almost - 4 year old, trying to be a supportive spouse and raising two highly sensitive children, which is no small feat.  I struggle to live in the chaos of the moment, while knowing that a new horizon is bursting to be sent forth from me.

It is hard for me to reflect on new beginnings when for so long I have put everyone else's needs before my own.  I am afraid to shake things up to start my own personal new beginning.  And yet, I am also excited to start a new personal beginning, that can lead me into a place of purpose within my vocational call and to see how it will benefit not just me but everyone around me.

Until next time!

-Megan.

Back to Basics

It has been a long time since I have sat down and taken the time to blog.

Honestly, I just didn't want to take the time to do it.  I couldn't come up with the right words to share my thoughts.

Basically, I have had a massive case of writer's block, which is slowly lifting.  For the first time in a year and a half, I am finding the words to express myself in writing and actually want to take the time to do it.

And so I am taking up blogging once more as a way to express and share my thoughts with others, in the hopes that it may inspire or help someone else down the road.

Blessings to you, until next time!