I hope I spelt nostalgic right. If I didn't, I blame it on my cold. I go from seeing clearly, to blurry because my eyes don't seem to want to focus properly.
Anyway, I am feeling a bit nostalgic today. It is a blizzard outside, I think I'm driving my husband crazy because I have no verbal filter when I am sick, and it is coming up to the end of the year.
But today I am especially thinking about my 2000 trip out East for my sister's wedding. It was the second time that I remember almost the whole family gathered together. I had just gotten back to the United States after a two week trip to Spain with my high school. Before that, I had graduated from high school. The day after I got back, I hopped on a plane to Boston and from there rode up to New Hampshire with my parents and brother. I just remember being cranky and exhausted. After a good nights sleep I was still tired and a little less cranky, but more able to be around people.
The wedding was beautiful and I was asked to read a passage during the ceremony, which was such an honor. The reception was fun with good food and dancing.
Then all the relatives headed down to my Uncle Mark and Aunt Lois's house, where, from what I remember, we all stayed for the next few days. We happened to be there over the 4th of July. While the rest of my family went and watched the fireworks, my cousins Eyleen and Jen took me to my first rave. I was 18 and it was an experience I will never forget. What I remember most about it was that Eyleen didn't give it a second thought about my going. She asked me if I wanted to go to a party with her and Jen and I said yes. Being shy and feeling awkward I wanted to hang out with my older cousins because it made me feel cool. It was a great decision.
I got offers from people to buy me drinks, which I did not accept begrudgingly. My cousin Jen was hit up to buy marajuana by some kid and while Jen and I mostly stood by the wall watching the people at the rave, Eyleen danced. She danced all night and at one point got me to go and dance with her as well and Jen came too. It was my first rave, my first major party and it was awesome!
I have always loved the east coast, but that was the trip I fell in love with the Northeast part of the country. It completely changed my life, for everytime I am there now, I feel like I can breath easier, like I am home. It was also the first time I felt truly accepted by and accepted my new family. See just the March before, 1999, my mom and step-dad Ted were married. I had met Ted's family before, but due to my history with extended family members, which without going into the gory details, was not good, I was leery of allowing Ted's family into my life, with the exception of my step-sister Steph and of course Ted.
This trip changed it all, I felt welcomed always and began to open up to my new family and never looked back. It took my sister's wedding and a rave to accomplish it and I could not ask for a more loving and wonderful extended family. I am sorry I do not keep in better touch. I get that from my dad Ted I suppose. ;) I love you all and God bless!!!
Saturday, December 11, 2010
Friday, December 3, 2010
Snow, Snow Everywhere...
One of the things I love about working on the 48th floor of a building is that it feels like I am in a snow globe when it snows. It is beautiful to witness.
In other news:
I am officially on a diet. I have been feeling sluggish lately from eating too much and not exercising enough. Therefore, I have decided to start counting my calories daily and to go the gym at least three times a week for at least 45 minutes. If we had more room in the apartment, I would love to get a Wii or an XBox 360 with Kinects (sp?) and dance myself into a sweat. Sadly that will have to wait until we live in a place with more space, like anywhere else. It is hard to motivate myself to go back out into the cold again once I get home from work, so this could be interesting. I am going to make every effort to do it though, despite my reservations of going out in the cold.
I have been looking at the goals I set for myself in January lately, seeing which ones I accomplished and which ones I still need to work on. I will update you on those towards the end of the month.
It is astonishing how fast this year has gone by, at least for me anyway. But the year is not over yet, so for now, I am going to read a little more of my TIME magazine and then go watch the snow fall some more.
P.S. If you get a chance, I highly recommend picking up a TIME magazine with their TimeFrames cover. It gives an interesting perspective on the past ten years. I am not saying I agree with everything written on the various topics they picked to cover. I do find it informative though.
In other news:
I am officially on a diet. I have been feeling sluggish lately from eating too much and not exercising enough. Therefore, I have decided to start counting my calories daily and to go the gym at least three times a week for at least 45 minutes. If we had more room in the apartment, I would love to get a Wii or an XBox 360 with Kinects (sp?) and dance myself into a sweat. Sadly that will have to wait until we live in a place with more space, like anywhere else. It is hard to motivate myself to go back out into the cold again once I get home from work, so this could be interesting. I am going to make every effort to do it though, despite my reservations of going out in the cold.
I have been looking at the goals I set for myself in January lately, seeing which ones I accomplished and which ones I still need to work on. I will update you on those towards the end of the month.
It is astonishing how fast this year has gone by, at least for me anyway. But the year is not over yet, so for now, I am going to read a little more of my TIME magazine and then go watch the snow fall some more.
P.S. If you get a chance, I highly recommend picking up a TIME magazine with their TimeFrames cover. It gives an interesting perspective on the past ten years. I am not saying I agree with everything written on the various topics they picked to cover. I do find it informative though.
Saturday, November 27, 2010
Does Time = Creativity?
Over the past few weeks I have been having a really hard time concentrating and writing my thesis. I was not organized and I couldn't get my thoughts in order to write anything of significance. I few weeks ago I was able to write quite a few pages in one sitting which got me energized. After that, though, I have not had a lot of time and when I do, I have a hard time writing more than a few pages at a time. This is not good.
This week is Thankgiving week. All the students at the seminary had the whole week off; I have Wednesday to Sunday off. Wednesday I went to the library and did not get much done. It was extremely frustrating because the roads were somewhat crappy in the evening and we ended up fighting traffic for 1.5 hours. It could definitely have been worse though.
Yesterday evening and all day today I have been on a roll, which got me thinking about time and creativity and ideas. When I am constantly going and get one day to really focus on writing I have a hard time focusing and instead find that can't concentrate and am not creative with my ideas. With little work done on Wednesday, no time writing on Thursday and a little bit of writing on Friday, I find that I am refreshed and creative today. In fact, I am going to finish chapter two of my thesis today, and it is not going to be the worst rough draft ever written.
Over the last few days off, I have been able to relax and do a lot of things that typically cause distractions for me on a normal week. Relaxation time, turned into reading for fun time (yes, I started read for a second time Bram Stoker's Dracula), and watching movies/the newest netflix we got in the mail. I have spent some quality time with my family because we stayed over night on Wednesday and stayed until around 9pm Thursday night. I spent time with my friend Karen, and we went to see HP7 on Friday afternoon. I have spent quality time with my husband and will probably see if I can head down to my friend Michelle's tonight, depending on when I finish writing chapter 2. See I only have three or so pages left and I will be finished with chapter 2 of my thesis at least until I get my advisors revision comments back (whenever that may be. I still haven't received anything for chapter 1.)
Anyway, just some food for thought. For now, I am going to get back to writing so then I can hopefully head to Michelle's for a bit tonight. :-)
This week is Thankgiving week. All the students at the seminary had the whole week off; I have Wednesday to Sunday off. Wednesday I went to the library and did not get much done. It was extremely frustrating because the roads were somewhat crappy in the evening and we ended up fighting traffic for 1.5 hours. It could definitely have been worse though.
Yesterday evening and all day today I have been on a roll, which got me thinking about time and creativity and ideas. When I am constantly going and get one day to really focus on writing I have a hard time focusing and instead find that can't concentrate and am not creative with my ideas. With little work done on Wednesday, no time writing on Thursday and a little bit of writing on Friday, I find that I am refreshed and creative today. In fact, I am going to finish chapter two of my thesis today, and it is not going to be the worst rough draft ever written.
Over the last few days off, I have been able to relax and do a lot of things that typically cause distractions for me on a normal week. Relaxation time, turned into reading for fun time (yes, I started read for a second time Bram Stoker's Dracula), and watching movies/the newest netflix we got in the mail. I have spent some quality time with my family because we stayed over night on Wednesday and stayed until around 9pm Thursday night. I spent time with my friend Karen, and we went to see HP7 on Friday afternoon. I have spent quality time with my husband and will probably see if I can head down to my friend Michelle's tonight, depending on when I finish writing chapter 2. See I only have three or so pages left and I will be finished with chapter 2 of my thesis at least until I get my advisors revision comments back (whenever that may be. I still haven't received anything for chapter 1.)
Anyway, just some food for thought. For now, I am going to get back to writing so then I can hopefully head to Michelle's for a bit tonight. :-)
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
Less Frustrated about Life...
Dear Friends,
There is a very loud individual grunting in the stacks in the Luther Seminary library. He just walked up the stairs and it sounds like a herd of elephants with a few disgruntled grunts every few seconds. It was hilarious.
Anyway, the last time I blogged I was feeling very down about life. I felt like I was failing at everything; my marriage, my family and friends, my thesis and at work. After writing that blog I did a lot of thinking and came up with a few conclusions in no particular order.
Since I am spending this afternoon working on my thesis, I'll start with that. I am not failing on my thesis. Though it is taking me much longer to write than I want it to, it doesn't mean I'm failing working on it. By the end of November I'll definitely have two chapter written and maybe even 3, depending on whether or not I am still having trouble finding information for chapter 4. This is very awesome and I should not get down about the length of time it is taking me.
My marriage is going great! I love spending time with Jason and have started to become comfortable not going home right away after work so I can go to the library for a little bit and work on my thesis. Jason and I have also started working out in God's Gym a few nights a week because I want to get in shape and lose a little weight and he comes with because he wants to do the same. The fact that he is not sick of me yet just goes to show that he's the real deal for me.
My family and friends, I do my best to keep in contact with them. I am still horrible about calling people, not that I don't want to talk to my family and friends, the opposite actually, I'm just not good at talking on the phone. It will be a life long process, my learning to be comfortable with talking to people on the phone. As for those of my family and friends in the area, I am trying to make a greater effort to hang out with them more. This is why I get down about my thesis taking me so long to write. When I am done writing it, I will have vast quantities of time to go to movies in the evenings or go hang out at someone's house and watch a favorite TV show. I miss that a lot.
As for work, well it is work and as much as it makes my stomach roll whenever I walk out off the elevator when I first get there everyday, I need the job to pay the major bills and finish paying off my credit card debt. I opted not to take out student loans because I only have to pay a grand total of $450 this year in fees. Of course, the school screwed up and charged me my continuation fee twice, which I still have to deal with, but taking out more student loans just did not make sense at the time. It still doesn't make sense, although I ache in ever fiber of my being to be a true student and spend my days writing my thesis and my nights either with my husband or friends or my husband with friends. Either way, my job gets in the way of me being what I love to be, a scholar, an academic, a student. I love all these things but can not be any of them fully because I don't have the amount of time I need to be these things.
I just keep telling myself that my job will end at the end of May, and I will be done with my thesis at the end of April. Once those two things happen, I am free. Just have to get to the end of May. I can do that. It is only 6.5 months, and let me tell you, that time is going to fly by so fast. ;-)
There is a very loud individual grunting in the stacks in the Luther Seminary library. He just walked up the stairs and it sounds like a herd of elephants with a few disgruntled grunts every few seconds. It was hilarious.
Anyway, the last time I blogged I was feeling very down about life. I felt like I was failing at everything; my marriage, my family and friends, my thesis and at work. After writing that blog I did a lot of thinking and came up with a few conclusions in no particular order.
Since I am spending this afternoon working on my thesis, I'll start with that. I am not failing on my thesis. Though it is taking me much longer to write than I want it to, it doesn't mean I'm failing working on it. By the end of November I'll definitely have two chapter written and maybe even 3, depending on whether or not I am still having trouble finding information for chapter 4. This is very awesome and I should not get down about the length of time it is taking me.
My marriage is going great! I love spending time with Jason and have started to become comfortable not going home right away after work so I can go to the library for a little bit and work on my thesis. Jason and I have also started working out in God's Gym a few nights a week because I want to get in shape and lose a little weight and he comes with because he wants to do the same. The fact that he is not sick of me yet just goes to show that he's the real deal for me.
My family and friends, I do my best to keep in contact with them. I am still horrible about calling people, not that I don't want to talk to my family and friends, the opposite actually, I'm just not good at talking on the phone. It will be a life long process, my learning to be comfortable with talking to people on the phone. As for those of my family and friends in the area, I am trying to make a greater effort to hang out with them more. This is why I get down about my thesis taking me so long to write. When I am done writing it, I will have vast quantities of time to go to movies in the evenings or go hang out at someone's house and watch a favorite TV show. I miss that a lot.
As for work, well it is work and as much as it makes my stomach roll whenever I walk out off the elevator when I first get there everyday, I need the job to pay the major bills and finish paying off my credit card debt. I opted not to take out student loans because I only have to pay a grand total of $450 this year in fees. Of course, the school screwed up and charged me my continuation fee twice, which I still have to deal with, but taking out more student loans just did not make sense at the time. It still doesn't make sense, although I ache in ever fiber of my being to be a true student and spend my days writing my thesis and my nights either with my husband or friends or my husband with friends. Either way, my job gets in the way of me being what I love to be, a scholar, an academic, a student. I love all these things but can not be any of them fully because I don't have the amount of time I need to be these things.
I just keep telling myself that my job will end at the end of May, and I will be done with my thesis at the end of April. Once those two things happen, I am free. Just have to get to the end of May. I can do that. It is only 6.5 months, and let me tell you, that time is going to fly by so fast. ;-)
Monday, November 1, 2010
When is it time?
When is it time to say enough is enough? Sometimes I feel so stretched that I'm about to break, like a rubber band being stretched so far that you can begin to see it fraying. When is it time to just call it quits and throw in the towel? I have a hard time giving up on anything I do or anyone I care about. So is there ever a time to say enough is enough, or do we keep on doing what we are doing and hope for the best? Sometimes I wish I could just throw my hands up and say I don't care, but I've never been able to do that. Most of the time I take things far too personally, when the reality is that there's not much I can do about someone else, I can only do the best I can to be a good family member, friend, colleague and hope I don't piss too many people off in the process. Anyway, I am mostly wondering how others cope with this feeling of frustration. As long as it doesn't cost money (that's a whole other frustration all together) I'm willing to listen to suggestions.
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
Sleep is for...well apparently not me.
I am exhausted! I spent last night tossing and turning trying to figure out how to deal with writing about almost two thousand years of history in 15 to 20 pages. It's not an easy problem to work out, but I think I finally have a solution; unfortunately I am so exhausted from my sleepless night that I might have to wait till tomorrow to go to the library and write.
NO! I have to stop doing that. I have to force myself to go to the library for at least an hour tonight and work on my thesis. I even drove up to campus today to force myself to go up there after work even if it is only for 30 minutes and I write 2 pages, per my self-perscribed schedule and then get back home before Glee comes on.
The two or more pages I write before I head back to the apartment to watch Glee probably won't be very good, but at least I'll have something to work with later.
Okay, I think I have sufficiently convinced myself to go to the library after work for a little bit and work on my thesis. I think I just needed to focus myself a bit. Tomorrow will be the major writing day, but it will be good to get a little done tonight too.
Off to go and break the receptionist at work, then to read a little about "The Origins of Christian Zionism" in 19th century England, before I have to take over receptionist duties from 4 to 5:30. Today would have been a perfect day to sit in the library and write, since the weather is gross. Oh well. Maybe tomorrow will be just as gross and be another perfect day to sit and write at my carrel. One can dream.
NO! I have to stop doing that. I have to force myself to go to the library for at least an hour tonight and work on my thesis. I even drove up to campus today to force myself to go up there after work even if it is only for 30 minutes and I write 2 pages, per my self-perscribed schedule and then get back home before Glee comes on.
The two or more pages I write before I head back to the apartment to watch Glee probably won't be very good, but at least I'll have something to work with later.
Okay, I think I have sufficiently convinced myself to go to the library after work for a little bit and work on my thesis. I think I just needed to focus myself a bit. Tomorrow will be the major writing day, but it will be good to get a little done tonight too.
Off to go and break the receptionist at work, then to read a little about "The Origins of Christian Zionism" in 19th century England, before I have to take over receptionist duties from 4 to 5:30. Today would have been a perfect day to sit in the library and write, since the weather is gross. Oh well. Maybe tomorrow will be just as gross and be another perfect day to sit and write at my carrel. One can dream.
Monday, October 25, 2010
6 pages down, 9 more to go...
I am working on writing one chapter of my thesis at a time. Today, I wrote three pages, which exceeds my two pages a day goal, and have three more already written from previous work. With due diligence, I should be able to finish Chapter 1 by the end of this week. That is my goal and with copious amounts of caffeine I can do this for sure! I will update my blog again once I've finished Chapter 1. It will be good motivation to get it done for Friday, so I have something to blog about later this week. Until then, I hope you have a wonderful week and stay warm! :-)
Friday, October 22, 2010
Life as I know it...
Since my last post, I have been spending time working out a new schedule for myself. So far, it is not going very well. I was barely used to the schedule I had and now having to come up with time to do everything I need to do is just exhausting.
I need to find time to write my thesis while trying to be a good wife, work at the office, spend time with friends and family and somehow come up with a minute or two each day for some me time so I continue to function on a daily basis. I rarely ever drank coffee and rarely drink soda, but I think those days have come to an end, at least until January/February.
I have also decided after much thought to delete my history blog and just write on this one. I don't have time to write for both and no one reads the other one anyway. Whenever I feel like writing something on history, I'll just blog about it here. That will help save me a few minutes a few days a week to put towards something else I should be doing instead, like writing my thesis.
My advisors are geniuses by the way. I have pages of information already written for Chapters 1-4 that I need to revise and expand upon. Chapter 5 is going to be the challenge because it is the chapter I have the least amount of information on. But being that I am in a good place with the rest of my thesis, I will have more time to work on Chapter 5 when the time comes. I am writing chapter by chapter and sending them as I complete them to my advisor, who will then send them back to me with comments, which I will then revise said chapter accordingly.
Okay, enough about that.
For now, I am going to read some more of the book I'm reading for thesis research and get another cup of coffee. Oh, now the fun begins!
I need to find time to write my thesis while trying to be a good wife, work at the office, spend time with friends and family and somehow come up with a minute or two each day for some me time so I continue to function on a daily basis. I rarely ever drank coffee and rarely drink soda, but I think those days have come to an end, at least until January/February.
I have also decided after much thought to delete my history blog and just write on this one. I don't have time to write for both and no one reads the other one anyway. Whenever I feel like writing something on history, I'll just blog about it here. That will help save me a few minutes a few days a week to put towards something else I should be doing instead, like writing my thesis.
My advisors are geniuses by the way. I have pages of information already written for Chapters 1-4 that I need to revise and expand upon. Chapter 5 is going to be the challenge because it is the chapter I have the least amount of information on. But being that I am in a good place with the rest of my thesis, I will have more time to work on Chapter 5 when the time comes. I am writing chapter by chapter and sending them as I complete them to my advisor, who will then send them back to me with comments, which I will then revise said chapter accordingly.
Okay, enough about that.
For now, I am going to read some more of the book I'm reading for thesis research and get another cup of coffee. Oh, now the fun begins!
Thursday, October 14, 2010
The Wait is Over...
Hey everybody! The wait is over! I am officially a candidate to graduate with my Master's of Theology from Luther Seminary upon completion of my thesis!
I am very happy and excited about this because it means I am finally able to move forward in a process that has been slow and at times painful. A step in the right direction is something I really needed to happen and it has.
Thank you for all your thoughts and prayers throughout this long process.
Now the fun part begins: writing the thesis. I have set a goal for myself of two pages a day. I have come up with a rigorous schedule, which means I may fall off the radar for a while. I have decided to keep a daily journal on my progress on my history blog. If you are interested in keeping up with what I am working on, how I am doing, and my progress that is the place to check out.
Thank you for all the support everyone!
I am very happy and excited about this because it means I am finally able to move forward in a process that has been slow and at times painful. A step in the right direction is something I really needed to happen and it has.
Thank you for all your thoughts and prayers throughout this long process.
Now the fun part begins: writing the thesis. I have set a goal for myself of two pages a day. I have come up with a rigorous schedule, which means I may fall off the radar for a while. I have decided to keep a daily journal on my progress on my history blog. If you are interested in keeping up with what I am working on, how I am doing, and my progress that is the place to check out.
Thank you for all the support everyone!
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
I think the wait will be over soon....
Today or tomorrow I will be finding out whether the History/Systematic Theology division has accepted my thesis proposal.
What it means if it is accepted: I pay the $250 candidacy fee and become a candidate to graduate with a Master's of Theology from Luther Seminary upon completing my thesis in accordance with the deadlines given to use by the Graduate Studies office.
What it means if it is not accepted: 1) I have to wait till November when the division meets again and revise my thesis proposal to their specifications so it will be acceptable. It will also put writing my thesis on hold, which means it is less likely that I meet the deadlines in order to graduate in May. 2) I will lose my will to live!
I decided a while ago that I want to write at least two pages of my thesis every day, with the exception of Saturdays or maybe Sundays (that I haven't decided yet.) It has to be 100 pages in length covering all the material necessary to make a cohesive argument for my thesis. That would mean that every 10 days (let's say Monday through Friday; so every two weeks) I will have a rough draft of my thesis written and ready to turn in to my advisor who will look it over and advise me on revisions to be done.
In order to keep myself on track I also made another decision; to keep track of my progress using one of my blogs. Now, I have two blogs to choose from, this blog or my history blog. I'm thinking I should write about my thesis stuff of my history blog, but if I do that I make it into more of a daily journal about myself rather than history. Oh, I don't know what to do. I suppose I'll make that decision when I find out whether or not my thesis proposal has been accepted.
Other than my constant anxiety about my thesis proposal, life is pretty great. Extremely busy, but great! Well that's enough yammering on for now. I'm going to go and check my luthersem email for the billionth time to see if I have any news yet about my thesis stuff. Cross everything people!!! I really need to get accepted today!
What it means if it is accepted: I pay the $250 candidacy fee and become a candidate to graduate with a Master's of Theology from Luther Seminary upon completing my thesis in accordance with the deadlines given to use by the Graduate Studies office.
What it means if it is not accepted: 1) I have to wait till November when the division meets again and revise my thesis proposal to their specifications so it will be acceptable. It will also put writing my thesis on hold, which means it is less likely that I meet the deadlines in order to graduate in May. 2) I will lose my will to live!
I decided a while ago that I want to write at least two pages of my thesis every day, with the exception of Saturdays or maybe Sundays (that I haven't decided yet.) It has to be 100 pages in length covering all the material necessary to make a cohesive argument for my thesis. That would mean that every 10 days (let's say Monday through Friday; so every two weeks) I will have a rough draft of my thesis written and ready to turn in to my advisor who will look it over and advise me on revisions to be done.
In order to keep myself on track I also made another decision; to keep track of my progress using one of my blogs. Now, I have two blogs to choose from, this blog or my history blog. I'm thinking I should write about my thesis stuff of my history blog, but if I do that I make it into more of a daily journal about myself rather than history. Oh, I don't know what to do. I suppose I'll make that decision when I find out whether or not my thesis proposal has been accepted.
Other than my constant anxiety about my thesis proposal, life is pretty great. Extremely busy, but great! Well that's enough yammering on for now. I'm going to go and check my luthersem email for the billionth time to see if I have any news yet about my thesis stuff. Cross everything people!!! I really need to get accepted today!
Thursday, October 7, 2010
Continuing to wait...
I am still waiting for an answer about my thesis proposal, but I have gotten the okay from my readers which makes me less nervous and stressed about the situation. So while I wait for the division to give the okay, I am continuing to read sources and trying to keep my cool. Luckily there are plenty of fun outtings this weekend to keep me distracted from the waiting.
Tomorrow night is Oktoberfest at Gastof's in N.E. Minneapolis. This yearly tradition was started in October 2007, when I went with my good friend Veronica Webber and company. I honestly don't remember everyone who was there that night, I just remember it was crowded and a whole lot of fun. :-) I have continued going every years since. This year is no exception and I'm just really excited to get myself a yummy Bavarian pretzl and guzzle down some German beer.
Saturday is my friend Matt's birthday party, which starts at Don Pablo's and continues at Manning's. I am very much looking forward to celebrating with Matt and company that night, Matt's day of birth. :-)
Aside: my phone just died while I was typing this. If you want to get a hold of me, you'll have to wait till after 6pm when I get home and plug it in.
Anyway, plenty of great happenings going on to keep me distracted. Now just to figure out how to keep myself distracted when I need to be sleeping. That ought to be hilarious.
On another note: My fantastic husband Jason has been approved by his faculty committee for First Call, which is a big step in the 5 bizillion step process he will be going throughout the rest of the school year. I am extremely proud of him!!! Love you handsome!!!
Hmmm...is there anything else to say? Not right now. I think I am going to work on coming up with something to write on my history blog. It has turned into a book summary and recommendation blog, which is not what I originally intended it to be, but it works. I've read plenty of history books in the last few months, but figuring out what I want to write about them is challenging. Hey, that's something else I can do to keep myself distracted while waiting; come up with blog entries for my history blog, that no one reads. It's mostly for myself anyway, so that's not a big deal.
Okay, now I am done writing. My thoughts are becoming all gumbled and are not making much sense to me anymore. When that happens it's time to quit for the day and start again tomorrow.
Tomorrow night is Oktoberfest at Gastof's in N.E. Minneapolis. This yearly tradition was started in October 2007, when I went with my good friend Veronica Webber and company. I honestly don't remember everyone who was there that night, I just remember it was crowded and a whole lot of fun. :-) I have continued going every years since. This year is no exception and I'm just really excited to get myself a yummy Bavarian pretzl and guzzle down some German beer.
Saturday is my friend Matt's birthday party, which starts at Don Pablo's and continues at Manning's. I am very much looking forward to celebrating with Matt and company that night, Matt's day of birth. :-)
Aside: my phone just died while I was typing this. If you want to get a hold of me, you'll have to wait till after 6pm when I get home and plug it in.
Anyway, plenty of great happenings going on to keep me distracted. Now just to figure out how to keep myself distracted when I need to be sleeping. That ought to be hilarious.
On another note: My fantastic husband Jason has been approved by his faculty committee for First Call, which is a big step in the 5 bizillion step process he will be going throughout the rest of the school year. I am extremely proud of him!!! Love you handsome!!!
Hmmm...is there anything else to say? Not right now. I think I am going to work on coming up with something to write on my history blog. It has turned into a book summary and recommendation blog, which is not what I originally intended it to be, but it works. I've read plenty of history books in the last few months, but figuring out what I want to write about them is challenging. Hey, that's something else I can do to keep myself distracted while waiting; come up with blog entries for my history blog, that no one reads. It's mostly for myself anyway, so that's not a big deal.
Okay, now I am done writing. My thoughts are becoming all gumbled and are not making much sense to me anymore. When that happens it's time to quit for the day and start again tomorrow.
Monday, October 4, 2010
Waiting for an Answer...
Sometimes there is nothing more stressful than sitting around waiting for an answer. This applies to just about everything, at least for me these days. Okay, not everything, mostly I've been spending some quality waiting around for an answer time regarding my thesis proposal. The longer it takes for my thesis proposal to get approved by the appropriate peoples, the longer I have to wait to "write" the actual thesis. Though I have small portions of it written already, if there are changes that need to be made, I don't want to start any hardcore writing until those have been taken care of. Then the hardcore part starts with daily evening trips to the library after work and barely seeing my husband, friends or family for months. Of course I will mentally need to take breaks from the writing process or else I will literally go insane, or maybe my brain will explode, or my fingers will fall off because of all of the typing. Who knows... There will be breaks but not as many as I have given myself liberty to have now. I am trying to relax before more chaos begins; trying to relax. But it is so stressful to just sit here and wait for an answer.
Friday, September 17, 2010
More Musings about Stuff...
I have had occasion recently to do some musing about stuff. For a while it was nothing in particular, but recently I have starting thinking about regret, suffering, life; all the things that lead me to the dark places in my mind. It's pretty morbid stuff to think about but there are certain times during the year where my thoughts lead me in that direction and there is not much I can do about it.
I can tell you this much though, there are just some hurts that never heal. After three years, I still feel the microscopic gap in my heart and soul ache on September 16th. Though the gap has shrunk in size, it will always be there.
When you've stared into someone's eyes and see the devil staring back at you, it is something you never get over. To see and exprience evil in such a way stays with you forever. You slowly lose confidence in humanity and become bitter and cynical. Luckily, God has a way of putting amazingly compassionate people in my life to easy the burden of having had such experiences. My mom for one; there is no possible way I would have made it through everything I've been through without her to watch over me, and my brother for another; he has been my motivation. For a long time it was just us. Then God in his infinite wisdom granted me an answer to my only prayer, he gave me the most wonderful dad in the world and an older sister and aunts and uncles, cousins, an adorable nephew and niece. And two weeks ago, he expanded my family to include wonderful in-laws. He put in my life the most wonderful man, my now husband Jason Pollington, whom I just adore and am having a blast being married to him.
But family is not always defined by blood and marriage. I have many many family members that most people would call close friends, but I like family instead. When you've gone through hell and back again with someone, they no longer are friends, they are family. These people help you stand on your own two feet when you can't muster up the energy to move and visa versa. It is a lovely relationship that I treasure always.
And so it goes, one day after the next, hoping that the bottom won't drop out from under you, but knowing that if it does, you have people in your life, Thanks be to God, that will help you through it if you allow them to. That's the part I'm working on, letting people help me when I am suffering or hurt; letting go of the idea that I am being a burden on them and letting them help. Knowing myself, it will be a life long process, something to work on always and placing my faith in God and my people.
I can tell you this much though, there are just some hurts that never heal. After three years, I still feel the microscopic gap in my heart and soul ache on September 16th. Though the gap has shrunk in size, it will always be there.
When you've stared into someone's eyes and see the devil staring back at you, it is something you never get over. To see and exprience evil in such a way stays with you forever. You slowly lose confidence in humanity and become bitter and cynical. Luckily, God has a way of putting amazingly compassionate people in my life to easy the burden of having had such experiences. My mom for one; there is no possible way I would have made it through everything I've been through without her to watch over me, and my brother for another; he has been my motivation. For a long time it was just us. Then God in his infinite wisdom granted me an answer to my only prayer, he gave me the most wonderful dad in the world and an older sister and aunts and uncles, cousins, an adorable nephew and niece. And two weeks ago, he expanded my family to include wonderful in-laws. He put in my life the most wonderful man, my now husband Jason Pollington, whom I just adore and am having a blast being married to him.
But family is not always defined by blood and marriage. I have many many family members that most people would call close friends, but I like family instead. When you've gone through hell and back again with someone, they no longer are friends, they are family. These people help you stand on your own two feet when you can't muster up the energy to move and visa versa. It is a lovely relationship that I treasure always.
And so it goes, one day after the next, hoping that the bottom won't drop out from under you, but knowing that if it does, you have people in your life, Thanks be to God, that will help you through it if you allow them to. That's the part I'm working on, letting people help me when I am suffering or hurt; letting go of the idea that I am being a burden on them and letting them help. Knowing myself, it will be a life long process, something to work on always and placing my faith in God and my people.
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
My Brand New Laptop
Today I went to Best Buy to pick up my brand new laptop. It is a Toshiba, like my last one. My old laptop lasted me four and half wonderful years. We went through a lot together. I wrote my first Master's thesis on it. Unfortunately, over the summer, or was it spring, I can't remember, my old laptop over heated and shut itself off while I was watching a movie on netflix instant. After that things went downhill. I will miss my old laptop, but I am looking forward to creating new memories with my new one.
So, good-bye old friend! And hello to my brand new laptop! :-)
So, good-bye old friend! And hello to my brand new laptop! :-)
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
I'M BACK!!!!
It has been a long time since I blogged last. In fact, so much has been going on in my life lately that I forgot I had a blog. And then to remember that I actually have two blogs, just blew my mind a little bit. I could summarize life since the middle of June, but I've decided instead to just start from scratch and work on blogging more.
One thing that has happened recently I can not ignore. I GOT MARRIED! I got married to the most wonderful man in the world, Jason Pollington, on September 4, 2010. My family has grown exponentially and I am completely in a blissful state. Hey, I might even call myself an optimist (I better not get ahead of myself though.) When I get the professional photos back, I'll post some on here for all to see. It was literally one of the best days of my life. It was so much fun and went by so fast.
That is the most important event that has happened in my life. Most of what happened in the months preceding led up to that truly blessed moment.
So what is going on in my life now? Here's a brief stetch of the crazy that is happening:
- I am continuing to work on research for my thesis. There has been yet another delay in my academic progress and I will not be turning in my thesis proposal until the end of September for the October faculty meeting.
- I am working 22.5 hours a week at the office with a new schedule allowing me to have Wednesdays off until the end of December. So far the extra day off during the week has been extremely helpful for my studies and I think it will be even more helpful when I start the actual writing process.
- Married life so far has been fun. It has been extremely busy too. I am looking forward to having some time with my husband to relax, stay in and watch movies, just enjoy each other's company without any distractions. I can't wait till January when we head out on our honeymoon. A whole week of just us and sightseeing! Alleluia!!!
In conclusion, life is beautiful! I am busy, busy, busy and having a blast!
It was great to see family and friends over our wedding weekend, though, like most people say, I wish I had more time to really talk to everyone. I am just so blessed in my life with wonderful people to share it with. I Love You All!!!
I know I have said this before, but I am going to make a better effort at this blogging thing. I want to blog at least once a week. So this is the start of my endeavor, again. Sometime I get so caught up in life, that I forget how much fun it is to take a few minutes and write about what is going on.
In the meantime, I am going to get back to work and share more soon!
One thing that has happened recently I can not ignore. I GOT MARRIED! I got married to the most wonderful man in the world, Jason Pollington, on September 4, 2010. My family has grown exponentially and I am completely in a blissful state. Hey, I might even call myself an optimist (I better not get ahead of myself though.) When I get the professional photos back, I'll post some on here for all to see. It was literally one of the best days of my life. It was so much fun and went by so fast.
That is the most important event that has happened in my life. Most of what happened in the months preceding led up to that truly blessed moment.
So what is going on in my life now? Here's a brief stetch of the crazy that is happening:
- I am continuing to work on research for my thesis. There has been yet another delay in my academic progress and I will not be turning in my thesis proposal until the end of September for the October faculty meeting.
- I am working 22.5 hours a week at the office with a new schedule allowing me to have Wednesdays off until the end of December. So far the extra day off during the week has been extremely helpful for my studies and I think it will be even more helpful when I start the actual writing process.
- Married life so far has been fun. It has been extremely busy too. I am looking forward to having some time with my husband to relax, stay in and watch movies, just enjoy each other's company without any distractions. I can't wait till January when we head out on our honeymoon. A whole week of just us and sightseeing! Alleluia!!!
In conclusion, life is beautiful! I am busy, busy, busy and having a blast!
It was great to see family and friends over our wedding weekend, though, like most people say, I wish I had more time to really talk to everyone. I am just so blessed in my life with wonderful people to share it with. I Love You All!!!
I know I have said this before, but I am going to make a better effort at this blogging thing. I want to blog at least once a week. So this is the start of my endeavor, again. Sometime I get so caught up in life, that I forget how much fun it is to take a few minutes and write about what is going on.
In the meantime, I am going to get back to work and share more soon!
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Musing about Time...
Lately I have been spending a good amount of time musing about time. It is an interesting concept to me. Without reading all the philosophical mumbo-gumbo about the topic, I intend find myself often wondering why time seems to go so fast or so slow. I remember when the summer seemed to last forever. Now it is already almost July and it feels like not too long ago there was still snow on the ground.
I suppose it has something to do with the fact that when we are younger we are actually able to relax and actually have bouts of boredom. Now that I am 28 I have responsibilities, like paying bills so I have to work. I am also a student so I have school work to do as well. These two things take up loads of time; add on planning a wedding and training for a 5K race and it makes for a constantly busy me. And of course, I want to spend time with friends in the area as well and occasionally see my parental units and brother. This leaves very little "time" for myself.
I do find that time though but I always have to sacrifice something else to have it. So what if my apartment is disgusting, I'm going catch up with friends on facebook, or blog, or watch a movie or read for fun instead of cleaning it... I don't need to work out today, I have to go grocery shopping instead... I think I'm going to take myself to a movie, instead of read for my thesis proposal today because I might go insane if I don't. Yes, something gets sacrificed so I can have time to myself.
I am looking forward to a time when I can actually just take a deep breath and do whatever I would like to do without sacrificing anything to do it. Yes that time will come. It's called the summer and/or fall of 2011. Oh how that time can't come fast enough...
I suppose it has something to do with the fact that when we are younger we are actually able to relax and actually have bouts of boredom. Now that I am 28 I have responsibilities, like paying bills so I have to work. I am also a student so I have school work to do as well. These two things take up loads of time; add on planning a wedding and training for a 5K race and it makes for a constantly busy me. And of course, I want to spend time with friends in the area as well and occasionally see my parental units and brother. This leaves very little "time" for myself.
I do find that time though but I always have to sacrifice something else to have it. So what if my apartment is disgusting, I'm going catch up with friends on facebook, or blog, or watch a movie or read for fun instead of cleaning it... I don't need to work out today, I have to go grocery shopping instead... I think I'm going to take myself to a movie, instead of read for my thesis proposal today because I might go insane if I don't. Yes, something gets sacrificed so I can have time to myself.
I am looking forward to a time when I can actually just take a deep breath and do whatever I would like to do without sacrificing anything to do it. Yes that time will come. It's called the summer and/or fall of 2011. Oh how that time can't come fast enough...
Thursday, June 10, 2010
And Another One Bits the Dust...
In my last blog I mentioned a position at the office I decided to apply for that is full-time in the Office Services department. I found out today that I did not get the job and basically sat around for two weeks waiting to hear back about it, only to find out that I was never even considered for it.
Now, I'm not upset about not getting the job, in fact, I probably would have turned it down in the end. What I'm upset about is being strung along for as long as I was. If I was too late with my application to be considered, just tell me so. Why the big show?! I'm an adult; I can take the no.
This is the third time I've put my name in to be considered for a full-time position at the Law Office I work at and the third time I've been turned down. Therefore, I've decided, yet again, to start the job search for a new job. I know whatever I find will need to be part-time and flexible because of school. I also know I will be taking a large pay cut with what ever job I end up with.
I have a few ideas of where to start looking and until I find something else I will be staying in the part-time position I have now at the office.
In an ideal world, I would stay at the office until September and then just be done working for the school year and focus on being a student, writing my thesis in the fall and working at a part-time job on campus, like the library or something like that to earn a little money to pay at least some of the bills every month. Unfortunately, I've never been that lucky, so it will be interesting to see what the future brings on the job front in the next few months.
Other than this disappointing day on the job front, things are going pretty good. Research for my thesis proposal is coming along well thus far and wedding plans are continuing to come along pretty smoothly as well. Invitations should arrive soon to be addressed and sent out in the near future. I'm hoping, like, tomorrow, but who knows...
Holy dude, it's 11:04 in the pm. I've got to get to bed. "Check you later!" (ala. Dazed and Confused style)
Now, I'm not upset about not getting the job, in fact, I probably would have turned it down in the end. What I'm upset about is being strung along for as long as I was. If I was too late with my application to be considered, just tell me so. Why the big show?! I'm an adult; I can take the no.
This is the third time I've put my name in to be considered for a full-time position at the Law Office I work at and the third time I've been turned down. Therefore, I've decided, yet again, to start the job search for a new job. I know whatever I find will need to be part-time and flexible because of school. I also know I will be taking a large pay cut with what ever job I end up with.
I have a few ideas of where to start looking and until I find something else I will be staying in the part-time position I have now at the office.
In an ideal world, I would stay at the office until September and then just be done working for the school year and focus on being a student, writing my thesis in the fall and working at a part-time job on campus, like the library or something like that to earn a little money to pay at least some of the bills every month. Unfortunately, I've never been that lucky, so it will be interesting to see what the future brings on the job front in the next few months.
Other than this disappointing day on the job front, things are going pretty good. Research for my thesis proposal is coming along well thus far and wedding plans are continuing to come along pretty smoothly as well. Invitations should arrive soon to be addressed and sent out in the near future. I'm hoping, like, tomorrow, but who knows...
Holy dude, it's 11:04 in the pm. I've got to get to bed. "Check you later!" (ala. Dazed and Confused style)
Friday, June 4, 2010
ChiTown, Work and 5Ks...
School's out for the summer! Sort of, well, actually, it was for about two weeks but now I have to get back to business. Here is a summary of what has happened in the last two weeks:
I decided, inspired by many friends, to attempt to run a 5K this summer. It will be on July 24th at Lumber Jack Days in Stillwater, Minnesota. I am pretty pumped about it actually. I have a lot of work to do on my breathing methods when I'm running because of my sports asthma, but I think I can pull it off. :) And I will not be racing alone. My friends Michelle and Eric Eckstrom and possibly a few others are going to be walking/running that day too. It will be a venerable party! Woot Woot!
As for work, blah... I am very torn about work. With researching and writing my thesis this next year, I really need to be in full student mode, which work does not allow me to do. If I was still working only 12 hours a week at the office things would be different. And genius me thought it would be a great idea to put my name in the running for a 37.5 hour a week position. For the summer it would be great, but once things really start picking up with school again, I will probably go crazy. I have absolutely no idea what to do. The extra money and being able to pay the bills for us would be awesome. So would my sanity. I already know what my mom will say. Need to have the money to pay the bills. That's true, but I also need the time to finish up my degree and graduate. Ugh...expletive, expletive, EXPLETIVE being an adult!
As for ChiTown :D, I went to visit Jason in Valparaiso, Indiana this past weekend which was wonderful! We spent Saturday in downtown Chicago, which I LOVED! All the tall buildings and old buildings and parks and the Lake; LOVED IT! I'm not sure I'd ever want to live there though. It's a great place to visit for a few days, every few years or so, but to live there is another story.
So I have a mission for you all if you choose to accept it: Say a few prayers for me as I discern what the "dude" to do about my work situation. Currently I work 22.5 hours a week, which is fine, but there are problems that go along with it, which I can't get into on blogger.
Thanks for your continued support and I love you all very much!
My next blog will have actual pictures of our time in ChiTown. :)
I decided, inspired by many friends, to attempt to run a 5K this summer. It will be on July 24th at Lumber Jack Days in Stillwater, Minnesota. I am pretty pumped about it actually. I have a lot of work to do on my breathing methods when I'm running because of my sports asthma, but I think I can pull it off. :) And I will not be racing alone. My friends Michelle and Eric Eckstrom and possibly a few others are going to be walking/running that day too. It will be a venerable party! Woot Woot!
As for work, blah... I am very torn about work. With researching and writing my thesis this next year, I really need to be in full student mode, which work does not allow me to do. If I was still working only 12 hours a week at the office things would be different. And genius me thought it would be a great idea to put my name in the running for a 37.5 hour a week position. For the summer it would be great, but once things really start picking up with school again, I will probably go crazy. I have absolutely no idea what to do. The extra money and being able to pay the bills for us would be awesome. So would my sanity. I already know what my mom will say. Need to have the money to pay the bills. That's true, but I also need the time to finish up my degree and graduate. Ugh...expletive, expletive, EXPLETIVE being an adult!
As for ChiTown :D, I went to visit Jason in Valparaiso, Indiana this past weekend which was wonderful! We spent Saturday in downtown Chicago, which I LOVED! All the tall buildings and old buildings and parks and the Lake; LOVED IT! I'm not sure I'd ever want to live there though. It's a great place to visit for a few days, every few years or so, but to live there is another story.
So I have a mission for you all if you choose to accept it: Say a few prayers for me as I discern what the "dude" to do about my work situation. Currently I work 22.5 hours a week, which is fine, but there are problems that go along with it, which I can't get into on blogger.
Thanks for your continued support and I love you all very much!
My next blog will have actual pictures of our time in ChiTown. :)
Monday, May 24, 2010
Bye Bye 24! and the end of an era...
Wow, two series finales in two nights. Although I was not emotionally compromised by the series finale of 24 as I was with last night's finale of LOST, it was still pretty freaking awesome!
It is the end of an era for me when it comes to television. I can honestly say that there is not a single show on TV that I feel the need to cancel all things and drop off the face of the earth for an hour to watch. Yes I enjoy aspects of GLEE, mostly Sue Silvester and the musical parts, but it is a show I don't mind watching online later on. There are TV shows that I enjoy, don't get me wrong, but it's not the same as my enthrallment with LOST and 24.
There is something about these two shows that captured my imagination, took me on a wild ride, to another world for an hour every season. For one hour a week, sometimes two, I was able to put aside everything and escape from whatever was bothering me or not bothering me and enter a wholly different and sometimes extremely bizarre world on a mysterious island with mysterious people, or on a wild goose chase to stop the bad guys from killing millions of innocent people in the United States and around the world.
There is nothing like LOST or 24 for me. Though people will try to recreate these shows in their own way, I truly believe they will fail because the original is always the best.
So here's to an end of an era for me and television. Looks like I'll be doing a lot more reading from now on.
(Aside: So You Think You Can Dance is starting again this summer, so I will be watching one show on TV fanatically. After it's over for the session, all bets are off.)
It is the end of an era for me when it comes to television. I can honestly say that there is not a single show on TV that I feel the need to cancel all things and drop off the face of the earth for an hour to watch. Yes I enjoy aspects of GLEE, mostly Sue Silvester and the musical parts, but it is a show I don't mind watching online later on. There are TV shows that I enjoy, don't get me wrong, but it's not the same as my enthrallment with LOST and 24.
There is something about these two shows that captured my imagination, took me on a wild ride, to another world for an hour every season. For one hour a week, sometimes two, I was able to put aside everything and escape from whatever was bothering me or not bothering me and enter a wholly different and sometimes extremely bizarre world on a mysterious island with mysterious people, or on a wild goose chase to stop the bad guys from killing millions of innocent people in the United States and around the world.
There is nothing like LOST or 24 for me. Though people will try to recreate these shows in their own way, I truly believe they will fail because the original is always the best.
So here's to an end of an era for me and television. Looks like I'll be doing a lot more reading from now on.
(Aside: So You Think You Can Dance is starting again this summer, so I will be watching one show on TV fanatically. After it's over for the session, all bets are off.)
Dear LOST:
As many of you know, from the very beginning I have been a huge fan of the tv show LOST, which ended last night. Of course I cried, almost hysterically for a while but when I finally calmed myself down, I was in utter awe that a tv show could cause such a powerful response from me. I've cried watching things before, but never like this.
I remember the summer before it started, seeing previews for it on tv and getting super excited every time. Yes, most times I even did my super excited giggle (yeah, you know the one ;) )...
And the show did not disappoint. Never did I waver in my loyalty, even when things got really weird. I let myself be taken on the wild ride that was and will always be LOST! Thank you for the amazing 6 year ride! :) I will always be grateful!
Sincerely,
One of your most loyal fans
-Megan.
I remember the summer before it started, seeing previews for it on tv and getting super excited every time. Yes, most times I even did my super excited giggle (yeah, you know the one ;) )...
And the show did not disappoint. Never did I waver in my loyalty, even when things got really weird. I let myself be taken on the wild ride that was and will always be LOST! Thank you for the amazing 6 year ride! :) I will always be grateful!
Sincerely,
One of your most loyal fans
-Megan.
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
DONE!!! and Now the Fun Begins?!
Hey all! As of tomorrow at 9:50ish in the am, I am officially done with classes at Luther Seminary. That does not mean I'm completely done, only that I have completed the first part of my degree, which a few months ago, I wasn't sure was going to happen.
Now the fun begins?! I get to work on my thesis proposal over the summer, turn it into the proper channels in September, pray to God it is accepted, and then start "officially" writing my thesis which I will work on throughout the fall semester. I'll probably actually do quite a bit on it over the summer hence the "officially" before. There is a lot of hoop jumping to be done still in this second part of my degree program, but at least the class part is over. No more writing papers. Now there is just one paper, a 100 page paper. The end is nigh...I can see the finish line and am looking forward to what happens next.
Oh yes...now the fun begins!
Now the fun begins?! I get to work on my thesis proposal over the summer, turn it into the proper channels in September, pray to God it is accepted, and then start "officially" writing my thesis which I will work on throughout the fall semester. I'll probably actually do quite a bit on it over the summer hence the "officially" before. There is a lot of hoop jumping to be done still in this second part of my degree program, but at least the class part is over. No more writing papers. Now there is just one paper, a 100 page paper. The end is nigh...I can see the finish line and am looking forward to what happens next.
Oh yes...now the fun begins!
Friday, April 30, 2010
Incentives and Guilty Pleasures...
Ok, I know this makes me a total nerd, but I can't help myself; I am rereading the Twilight Saga at least up to Eclipse in preparation for the movie coming out at the end of June. It was to be my incentive to write my independent study paper, and then I can start reading the books. This book series, like many many other people I know personally is my guilty pleasure, along with The Historian, but I, yes I, have lent that book out so I can't read it again until I get it back.
My incentive worked against me. I finally gave up and started reading Twilight anyway, even though I am not done with my paper, in fact, I have not even started writing it. This is bad. Very bad. Since I gave in to one of my guilty pleasures, I have no incentive anymore and the worst part is, I don't even care. I mean, I care about writing the paper and doing it well, but I don't feel bad about jumping the gun and reading something I don't have time to read when I should be writing instead. I truly don't care.
In fact, I've decided that this weekend is my selfish weekend. I'm doing everything I've wanted to do for a long time but have denied myself. I am going to go shopping for shoes and another pair of jeans and some shirts for work. I'm going to go see a movie, even though I saw a movie last night with Erica, I'm going to go again; hell, maybe tonight. I'm going to read Twilight till my eyes get so tired I can't keep them open anymore. And then, when I have done all those things, I am going to sit down at my laptop and start type up a rough draft of my paper until I can't sit and type anymore. It will probably suck, but at least I'll have something to work with.
Of course, I need to leave some time during my "selfish" weekend to clean my dirty apartment, disgusting would probably be a better word to describe it actually, and laundry will need to be done as well. There's always something that gets in the way of truly "selfish" time. Hopefully these things won't get too in the way though or else they will just have to wait for another time. Not the laundry though, that will definitely have to get done.
So that is my new plan of action for getting my final paper done for my only and last class at Luther Seminary. Over the summer and in the fall I will be working on my thesis and will not have to take anymore classes. WOOT!
Anyway, I got off track there...so my new plan for getting my paper done is to have a completely "selfish" weekend and get rid of all the distractions and then get down to business. Sometimes a person just needs to let loose and do what they want when they want to. This weekend is that time for me. I'll let you know how it turns out.
My incentive worked against me. I finally gave up and started reading Twilight anyway, even though I am not done with my paper, in fact, I have not even started writing it. This is bad. Very bad. Since I gave in to one of my guilty pleasures, I have no incentive anymore and the worst part is, I don't even care. I mean, I care about writing the paper and doing it well, but I don't feel bad about jumping the gun and reading something I don't have time to read when I should be writing instead. I truly don't care.
In fact, I've decided that this weekend is my selfish weekend. I'm doing everything I've wanted to do for a long time but have denied myself. I am going to go shopping for shoes and another pair of jeans and some shirts for work. I'm going to go see a movie, even though I saw a movie last night with Erica, I'm going to go again; hell, maybe tonight. I'm going to read Twilight till my eyes get so tired I can't keep them open anymore. And then, when I have done all those things, I am going to sit down at my laptop and start type up a rough draft of my paper until I can't sit and type anymore. It will probably suck, but at least I'll have something to work with.
Of course, I need to leave some time during my "selfish" weekend to clean my dirty apartment, disgusting would probably be a better word to describe it actually, and laundry will need to be done as well. There's always something that gets in the way of truly "selfish" time. Hopefully these things won't get too in the way though or else they will just have to wait for another time. Not the laundry though, that will definitely have to get done.
So that is my new plan of action for getting my final paper done for my only and last class at Luther Seminary. Over the summer and in the fall I will be working on my thesis and will not have to take anymore classes. WOOT!
Anyway, I got off track there...so my new plan for getting my paper done is to have a completely "selfish" weekend and get rid of all the distractions and then get down to business. Sometimes a person just needs to let loose and do what they want when they want to. This weekend is that time for me. I'll let you know how it turns out.
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
Awesome Presents!
This past Sunday I went to the fortress of solitude (aka my parent's house) and spent some time with my mother parental unit and brother unit. It was nice to just hang out and enjoy each other's company. Mom had asked me last week what I wanted for my birthday, so I sent her a list of movies, of which I figured she'd choose two.
After about an hour of solitude time, I went to the kitchen to look for something to munch on and noticed something I never paid much attention to before. My parent's a few years ago bought a Philip's radio with an ipod dock. I messed around with it for a bit to check out the sound quality and decided I wanted one for myself. Luckily, mom hadn't bought my present of two movies yet and bought a Philip's radio with an ipod dock for me instead.
We don't really surprise each other with gifts anymore. We all typically know what we are going to be getting, which for some people is appalling, but for us, we thinking of it as, "we are actually getting something we want and will use." I actually prefer this mode of gift giving, but sometimes it is nice to be pleasantly surprised.
I was slightly, somewhat pleasantly surprised by Jason's present, which was the first three seasons of The Tudors on DVD! I'm so freaking excited that I own that now! I haven't had much of a chance to watch it again, but now I can watch it whenever I want in the future! :) I was also slightly but pleasantly surprised by my workmates (who are awesome by the way!) as they threw a small Happy Birthday gathering with amazingly yummy treats for me yesterday. Lexie and Seth kind of gave it away on Monday, but it was still nice of them to bring treats to celebrate my birthday with me.
And I was completely surprised by the cards and present from Carrie and the cards from Michelle and Karen. Thanks ladies! I was also surprised by my boss's gift of two K.D. Lang CDs and a gift certificate to Target.
My boss has teased me the past week about getting so many gift certificates. The first one to Barnes & Noble I won for winning a contest of putting the name of the library with the picture at the Hennepin County Law Library. Yes I got them all right and yes I know that makes be a huge nerd. So what's new?! The second one I was gifted from the office for Administration Professional's Day (yes that is an actually day that is celebrated in the office world) to Target. The third one Jason's parent's sent me and it was to Barnes & Noble. I had a good amount of money to spend at both places and I took full advantage of it. :)
So yesterday after work, I took the bus home per norm and headed over to Barnes & Noble to use my $50 worth of gift certificates. I ended up buying two books: The Swan Theives by Elizabeth Kostova and The Help by, well I can't remember who wrote it but my mom raves about it and I know several other people who read it and really liked it. Then I headed to Super Target to get some groceries, but only ended up getting a few things because their produce section is quite disappointing. Now I have to go to Rainbow today after work to finish my grocery shopping for the next million years because I hate hate hate grocery shopping with a passion; but that explanation can wait for another blog. Other than that, I am going to attempt to start writing my independent study paper while listening to music from my ipod with my new spiffy radio. :)
After about an hour of solitude time, I went to the kitchen to look for something to munch on and noticed something I never paid much attention to before. My parent's a few years ago bought a Philip's radio with an ipod dock. I messed around with it for a bit to check out the sound quality and decided I wanted one for myself. Luckily, mom hadn't bought my present of two movies yet and bought a Philip's radio with an ipod dock for me instead.
We don't really surprise each other with gifts anymore. We all typically know what we are going to be getting, which for some people is appalling, but for us, we thinking of it as, "we are actually getting something we want and will use." I actually prefer this mode of gift giving, but sometimes it is nice to be pleasantly surprised.
I was slightly, somewhat pleasantly surprised by Jason's present, which was the first three seasons of The Tudors on DVD! I'm so freaking excited that I own that now! I haven't had much of a chance to watch it again, but now I can watch it whenever I want in the future! :) I was also slightly but pleasantly surprised by my workmates (who are awesome by the way!) as they threw a small Happy Birthday gathering with amazingly yummy treats for me yesterday. Lexie and Seth kind of gave it away on Monday, but it was still nice of them to bring treats to celebrate my birthday with me.
And I was completely surprised by the cards and present from Carrie and the cards from Michelle and Karen. Thanks ladies! I was also surprised by my boss's gift of two K.D. Lang CDs and a gift certificate to Target.
My boss has teased me the past week about getting so many gift certificates. The first one to Barnes & Noble I won for winning a contest of putting the name of the library with the picture at the Hennepin County Law Library. Yes I got them all right and yes I know that makes be a huge nerd. So what's new?! The second one I was gifted from the office for Administration Professional's Day (yes that is an actually day that is celebrated in the office world) to Target. The third one Jason's parent's sent me and it was to Barnes & Noble. I had a good amount of money to spend at both places and I took full advantage of it. :)
So yesterday after work, I took the bus home per norm and headed over to Barnes & Noble to use my $50 worth of gift certificates. I ended up buying two books: The Swan Theives by Elizabeth Kostova and The Help by, well I can't remember who wrote it but my mom raves about it and I know several other people who read it and really liked it. Then I headed to Super Target to get some groceries, but only ended up getting a few things because their produce section is quite disappointing. Now I have to go to Rainbow today after work to finish my grocery shopping for the next million years because I hate hate hate grocery shopping with a passion; but that explanation can wait for another blog. Other than that, I am going to attempt to start writing my independent study paper while listening to music from my ipod with my new spiffy radio. :)
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
It's my Birthday and I'll Blog if I want to...
Today is my 28th year on this earth and it has been a great day so far! :) Usually I find myself reflecting on the year past but this year I am looking towards the future. 27 was a pretty great year, but it had its rough spots, like any year.
The good things: I fell in love and got engaged to the most wonderful guy I've ever met, I paid off almost all of my credit card debt, I got to travel a bit within the midwest for friends ordinations, a camping trip with amazing friends, and to random destinations to meet up with Jason.
Not so great things: having to say good-bye to a lot of wonderful people that I care about deeply and miss like crazy everyday. I am happy for their new adventures and I miss them all a lot. Living in a house that should have been condemned years ago for lack of upkeep was not the smartest decision ever but it led to some good things in the end. All three of us moved out within a month or so of each other, Karen bought a town house where she now lives, I moved into an apartment on campus where Jason and I will be living when he gets back from internship (and where ironically Ms. Natalie Gessert used to live. Seriously, we are walking in your foot steps, Jason being at the same internship site you were at and me living in your old apartment. :)), and Jen is off on wild and crazy adventures in Europe.
Even though there were some sad, upsetting, frustrating times this past year, 27 was pretty great. Though I don't know if anything is going to top 28. It's going to be a fantastic year! I'm off to read about how the volcano in Iceland shut down a continent in my TIME magazine and then head up to the front desk to answer phones this afternoon. Tonight's festivities include: a quick run to the grocery store for milk and a few other necessities, a Subway run, a few phone calls before LOST comes on, and general relaxation. Yeah for birthdays!
The good things: I fell in love and got engaged to the most wonderful guy I've ever met, I paid off almost all of my credit card debt, I got to travel a bit within the midwest for friends ordinations, a camping trip with amazing friends, and to random destinations to meet up with Jason.
Not so great things: having to say good-bye to a lot of wonderful people that I care about deeply and miss like crazy everyday. I am happy for their new adventures and I miss them all a lot. Living in a house that should have been condemned years ago for lack of upkeep was not the smartest decision ever but it led to some good things in the end. All three of us moved out within a month or so of each other, Karen bought a town house where she now lives, I moved into an apartment on campus where Jason and I will be living when he gets back from internship (and where ironically Ms. Natalie Gessert used to live. Seriously, we are walking in your foot steps, Jason being at the same internship site you were at and me living in your old apartment. :)), and Jen is off on wild and crazy adventures in Europe.
Even though there were some sad, upsetting, frustrating times this past year, 27 was pretty great. Though I don't know if anything is going to top 28. It's going to be a fantastic year! I'm off to read about how the volcano in Iceland shut down a continent in my TIME magazine and then head up to the front desk to answer phones this afternoon. Tonight's festivities include: a quick run to the grocery store for milk and a few other necessities, a Subway run, a few phone calls before LOST comes on, and general relaxation. Yeah for birthdays!
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
Saving Money and Netflix...
Ever since I signed up for my own netflix about a month ago, I have saved quite a bit of money. It helps that there are only a few movies out right now in the more independent theaters that I want to see. But I don't want to see them bad enough to pay for them. No, I'll just add them to my ever growing netflix list. And because I have a new movie to watch every few days, I have been eating at home more, instead of going out to eat. This also helps in my attempt to save money.
It is nice to have a job that pays me enough so I can pay my bills as well as treat myself to a movie every once in a while. At this point in time though, I would rather go home after work, through something together for dinner and watch my recently arrived movie from netflix.
Okay, so besides being thrifty with my money due to my new fascination and love of netflix, I am attempting to lose some weight. Making meals at home has helped as well as paying more attention to what I am eating and how much of it. My goal by September is to lose at least 10 lbs. and keep it off. Also to tone my body some more; get rid of the ever expanding bulge in my mid-torso section.
In other news, my class is going okay. I spent some time in the library Monday morning harrassing the reference librarian and today making copies of articles to read for my paper. It looks like I'll be turning in my thesis proposal sometime during the summer, more likely end of August. I still think I can get it done by the May 1st deadline, but my advisor is less optimistic. Way to have my back dude! Thanks! I'm still going to work on research and writing it though throughout the summer, even though it will not be officially approved until the fall. That's me giving the one finger salute to the establishment. HAH! I still need to write a letter of continuation though and pay the $169/semester I will be a student. Lame.
Some much freaking red tape and hoops to jump through. It's all just so stupid and frustrating. I just want to be done already. I'm still going to attempt to get my proposal done by April 30th. That means I might fall off the grid for a few weeks while I attempt to get all the paper work and crap done for it as well as finish up my independent study. I know I can do it. I've done it before. Now is the time to take a deep breath and immerse myself in the chaos for the time being, until all tasks are complete.
Here's me taking a deep breath..........................................and jumping. I'll let you when I reemerge. :)
It is nice to have a job that pays me enough so I can pay my bills as well as treat myself to a movie every once in a while. At this point in time though, I would rather go home after work, through something together for dinner and watch my recently arrived movie from netflix.
Okay, so besides being thrifty with my money due to my new fascination and love of netflix, I am attempting to lose some weight. Making meals at home has helped as well as paying more attention to what I am eating and how much of it. My goal by September is to lose at least 10 lbs. and keep it off. Also to tone my body some more; get rid of the ever expanding bulge in my mid-torso section.
In other news, my class is going okay. I spent some time in the library Monday morning harrassing the reference librarian and today making copies of articles to read for my paper. It looks like I'll be turning in my thesis proposal sometime during the summer, more likely end of August. I still think I can get it done by the May 1st deadline, but my advisor is less optimistic. Way to have my back dude! Thanks! I'm still going to work on research and writing it though throughout the summer, even though it will not be officially approved until the fall. That's me giving the one finger salute to the establishment. HAH! I still need to write a letter of continuation though and pay the $169/semester I will be a student. Lame.
Some much freaking red tape and hoops to jump through. It's all just so stupid and frustrating. I just want to be done already. I'm still going to attempt to get my proposal done by April 30th. That means I might fall off the grid for a few weeks while I attempt to get all the paper work and crap done for it as well as finish up my independent study. I know I can do it. I've done it before. Now is the time to take a deep breath and immerse myself in the chaos for the time being, until all tasks are complete.
Here's me taking a deep breath..........................................and jumping. I'll let you when I reemerge. :)
Monday, April 12, 2010
Twins Baseball from 48 floors up...
I got to experience a unique view of the new Target Field today on this Twins Opener. At 2:50 this afternoon, fighter jets flew over head, but to me, they were flying eye level. The fireworks seemed miniscule from 48 floors up, but it was still really cool to watch. I am slowly losing my funk from last week. I also discovered today that I've been completely off the mark with my reading so far for my independent study. So in the next month I have to basically start from scratch except for a few books I've already looked at that will be helpful and write a 25-30 page paper on my findings. Well at least it will keep me busy and motivated (eh...maybe motivated isn't the right word here. ;))
Well, better go. I'm going to see if I can't watch a little more Twins baseball from 48 floors up. :D
Well, better go. I'm going to see if I can't watch a little more Twins baseball from 48 floors up. :D
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
That Time of Year...
It's that time of year again, when I get bored with life. Nothing particularly bad is happening; in fact things are going pretty good right now, I'm just bored. My motivation factor is at zero and I have little patience for anything. Exhibit A: a particular person is throwing a temper tantrum right now because something isn't working fast enough for this person. Three guesses who that might be (but you'll only need one.) I have zero tolerance for that right now. And the world is about to fall apart because the copier ran out of paper.
I don't know why I get this way, but every year around this time I always find myself wishing I was doing something else, traveling somewhere or doing something wildly different than the normal routine. I get bored with being an adult and attempt to try new things. Last year, I started belly-dancing lessons. This year I have no idea. With work and the amount of reading I need to do for my independent study, it leaves little time to take a community class, let alone keep up with friends and family. Here's to hoping this funk goes away soon. It's pretty lame.
I don't know why I get this way, but every year around this time I always find myself wishing I was doing something else, traveling somewhere or doing something wildly different than the normal routine. I get bored with being an adult and attempt to try new things. Last year, I started belly-dancing lessons. This year I have no idea. With work and the amount of reading I need to do for my independent study, it leaves little time to take a community class, let alone keep up with friends and family. Here's to hoping this funk goes away soon. It's pretty lame.
Thursday, April 1, 2010
Scary moment but all is okay...
Since the Sunday I got back from visiting with Jason in Milwaukee I had been having some pain in my lower left abdomen. I won't go into details but as the week went on, it started to hurt more until this past Sunday when I was going to head down to the basement and switch my laundry and I doubled over in pain. I immediately looked up doctors' offices and made an appointment for Tuesday morning. The pain was equally bad on Monday and I wanted to rip my shoulders off on Tuesday while I was at work. After several pokes and prods, nothing was found to be abnormal. I just have a cyst on my ovary which is supposed to be there and will go away after my menstral cycle. If the pain continues after that, then I have to go back to the doctor.
Well, you can probably image the initial panic I was in because I had not experienced this before. I mean, maybe for just one day and some over the counter aleve or tylenol would take care of it. This was different. But thankfully I checked out okay and it won't happen again.
In other news: I am behind in my independent study, still totally obsessed with The Tudors, and miss all my friends very much. I like living alone, but sometimes it is isolating. These are the days when I wish being an adult wasn't so time consuming and we could all live care free lives and travel to see whomever, whenever we wanted. Maybe when I finally make my millions, it will be so.
Well, you can probably image the initial panic I was in because I had not experienced this before. I mean, maybe for just one day and some over the counter aleve or tylenol would take care of it. This was different. But thankfully I checked out okay and it won't happen again.
In other news: I am behind in my independent study, still totally obsessed with The Tudors, and miss all my friends very much. I like living alone, but sometimes it is isolating. These are the days when I wish being an adult wasn't so time consuming and we could all live care free lives and travel to see whomever, whenever we wanted. Maybe when I finally make my millions, it will be so.
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
Milwaukee?!
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I had been to the Milwaukee area before and mostly remembered a few hours of sitting on the shore of Lake Michigan sinking my feet into the soft sand, while staring out at the vast body of water, unable to see land on the other side. Oh it was wonderful.
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I was able to experience this joy again, without the sinking my feet in the sand part (it was way too cold for that) last weekend. I also kind of fell in love with the downtown area. As we walked around Wisconsin Street Friday evening, there was a great picture op, which sadly I missed out on because I decided to leave my camera in the car. While walking around downtown we stopped at the mall there and I bought a funky dress at T.J. Maxx which my friend Virginia Berry would be so proud of. I didn't get a picture of that either. Sorry. Anyway, I found myself continuously telling Jason that I wouldn't mind him getting a call in Milwaukee, which I never in a million years thought I would say. But then again, I've done a lot of things in life that I thought I'd never do. So the lesson of this story kids is never say never. Next stop, Memorial Day weekend, Valpo, IN and maybe Chicago! I think it would be kind of fun to go to all the major mid-western cities. That means from now until the end of August we need to go to Chicago and Detroit for sure. Sweet! Bring on the travel! As for now, Milwaukee has a special place in my heart and not just because it has many breweries that one can tour and get free samples. ;)
Enough of my incoherent rambling; I have to get to bed. I have a meeting with my adviser at 9am tomorrow and we all know I am not a morning person. Peace out for now!
Friday, March 12, 2010
Goals are a good thing to have...Update
Every year I come up with a list of goals for myself. I do thing to keep life interesting and to give myself something to work towards. I do this because I am a planner and if I have nothing to plan towards, I have a hard time getting myself to do anything. It makes be feel useful and gives me a purpose in life. Goals are a good thing to have. I don't by into the New Year's resolution bit. You make a resolution, often times you break it, at least I do. Things like dieting, losing weight, the most common resolutions are good, but it is so easy to fall flat on your face after a few months. This is not always the case though. Good friends of mine, Doug Johnson and Theresa Jacobson have been very successful in their endeavors to get healthier, lose weight and keep it off. Three cheers for them and everyone else I know working towards the same goal. Notice, I used goal instead of resolution.
Anyway, my goals for this year are and continue to be as follows:
Goals:
1) Finish paying off bad debt, or almost all bad debt
2) Plan wedding with Jason and Get married
3) Spend more time with family in the area
4) Be better about staying in touch with family and friends
5) Be more adventurous, don't say never
6) Find solutions to my academic predicament including passing German exam before Fall semester.
I like to give myself goals that I can work on over time, that allow me to improve myself daily. I always struggle with goals like 3 and 4. I do the best I can, but I sometimes feel like I am not doing enough. It is hard when many of my friends are far away and I can not see them face to face. Thank God for facebook so I can facebook stalk all of you at least once a week to find out how you are doing. Sadly, I find myself very busy with school and work that phone calls do not happen very often. I am working on that.
As for the more concrete goals 1, 2, and 6, things are going very smoothly. I have one more credit card to pay down, which will take some time but I should be done by the end of the year. Wedding plans are coming along as well. We have the church and reception areas booked, as well as the DJ. I am meeting with the person we want to do our photography on Saturday and we have picked out some of the music for the wedding, but not all of it. And today I am sending out the first part of our Save the Date cards so people can, well, save the date. As for goal 6, I posted in my last blog that I passed the French language exam and have been officially switched into the Chruch History MTh program. So now I can start working on my thesis proposal, finish my independent study I have this spring, petition for a previous class to be counted as Church History so I will be done with class work by the end of this semester and start researching and writing my thesis. All my concrete goals are going amazingly well.
It is the self-improvement goals that I am working on daily. I will never be perfect at these things and I will drive myself crazy trying to be, or thinking that I can be. But goals of self improvement are never a bad thing. Goals are a good thing to have.
Anyway, my goals for this year are and continue to be as follows:
Goals:
1) Finish paying off bad debt, or almost all bad debt
2) Plan wedding with Jason and Get married
3) Spend more time with family in the area
4) Be better about staying in touch with family and friends
5) Be more adventurous, don't say never
6) Find solutions to my academic predicament including passing German exam before Fall semester.
I like to give myself goals that I can work on over time, that allow me to improve myself daily. I always struggle with goals like 3 and 4. I do the best I can, but I sometimes feel like I am not doing enough. It is hard when many of my friends are far away and I can not see them face to face. Thank God for facebook so I can facebook stalk all of you at least once a week to find out how you are doing. Sadly, I find myself very busy with school and work that phone calls do not happen very often. I am working on that.
As for the more concrete goals 1, 2, and 6, things are going very smoothly. I have one more credit card to pay down, which will take some time but I should be done by the end of the year. Wedding plans are coming along as well. We have the church and reception areas booked, as well as the DJ. I am meeting with the person we want to do our photography on Saturday and we have picked out some of the music for the wedding, but not all of it. And today I am sending out the first part of our Save the Date cards so people can, well, save the date. As for goal 6, I posted in my last blog that I passed the French language exam and have been officially switched into the Chruch History MTh program. So now I can start working on my thesis proposal, finish my independent study I have this spring, petition for a previous class to be counted as Church History so I will be done with class work by the end of this semester and start researching and writing my thesis. All my concrete goals are going amazingly well.
It is the self-improvement goals that I am working on daily. I will never be perfect at these things and I will drive myself crazy trying to be, or thinking that I can be. But goals of self improvement are never a bad thing. Goals are a good thing to have.
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
FREEDOM and Language Exams!!!
Hello all. Today while at work with nothing to do, again, I was checking up on my academic progress and found out that I finally passed the language exam. I'll repeat that. I finally passed the language exam!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! This means I can start working on thesis proposal stuff and finish up any loose ends with class stuff since and get this, I was finally admitted into the Church History program after a year of haggling!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
As for freedom, I will be moving out of the craptastical house this Sunday. I will miss Karen, my partner in crime. I will not miss the house though. I will miss absolutely nothing about the house, except maybe the extra space. But I will forgo space to be healthy anytime. It will be weird living alone again, but it won't be for long! For the first time in a long time, I am excited about life. I forgot how amazing this feeling is and even though it is probably fleeting, I am going to try and hold onto it as long as humanly possible. Looks like real optimism (as opposed to cautious optimism, my goal for Lent) is going to be around for a while. :D
As for freedom, I will be moving out of the craptastical house this Sunday. I will miss Karen, my partner in crime. I will not miss the house though. I will miss absolutely nothing about the house, except maybe the extra space. But I will forgo space to be healthy anytime. It will be weird living alone again, but it won't be for long! For the first time in a long time, I am excited about life. I forgot how amazing this feeling is and even though it is probably fleeting, I am going to try and hold onto it as long as humanly possible. Looks like real optimism (as opposed to cautious optimism, my goal for Lent) is going to be around for a while. :D
Thursday, February 11, 2010
Just Another Day in Crazy Town...
Yesterday, Karen, Jen and I received an email from our landlord's overseer that someone was going to be coming to the house today to start working on fixing the ceilings and walls and mold problems in the house. When it gets warmer, this same fix-it guy will remove the ice-damn from the roof which is the cause of all the problems in the first place.
So this morning I woke up early, putzed online a little bit, to check and see if the overseer had emailed us about the guy coming. There was no email, but I continued to get ready for the day anyway. The original email had mentioned something about the guy showing up sometime around 10am so I wanted to be done getting ready before that. After some breakfast around 9:15am, I decided to go back online to see if Brent (the overseer) had sent anything, and again there was nothing. So I read Wicked for about 2.5 hours and headed to work. The fix-it guy never showed up. This, of course, is not surprising to me because this kind of thing has been happening since we moved into the piece of crap house.
And then as I was walking to the bus today I felt a huge weight being lifted off my shoulders and I realized that I just don't give a flying *expletive* about anything dealing with the house anymore. I have an apartment I can move into on campus starting March 16th and damnit, I'm frickin' moving. I'm done with it all. I'm tired of constantly feeling like crap because of mold allergies. I'm done with it and Thanks Be to God that I only have a little over a month left of it. I won't be able to move the big stuff out until the weekend after the 16th. In my mind as of this very moment, I am no longer at the house, I am gone, going, going, gone. This is going to be a very long month.
In other news:
Jen has moved out and back to Pennsylvania before she heads out on her adventures in Europe. I already miss her very very much. It is sad to see her go and she always has an apartment to stay at when she's in the area. :)
Jason was here this past weekend. It was fabulous. We nailed down our reception site, The Radisson University, which is on Washington Ave. S.E., not University like I wrote before.
Other than that, I'm still waiting for my advisor to sign my independent study sheet so I can turn it into the registrar's office and be considered a student. It has been slightly frustrating, especially since the last day I can turn it in is tomorrow, but I still like how things are going school wise right now. My independent study is going to kick ass! I'm super excited about it, which is great for a change.
I've been thinking about what I should do for Lent. Most people give up something, I usually try to set aside time everyday to meditate, or read the Bible, or just have quiet time with God. This year I'm going to switch it up a bit and give up something. I'm going to give up caring about the goings on at the house, just go with the flow, and do what's best in the end for my health, like move out before the end of March if need be. Of course, this will be done in addition to quiet time and Bible reading and meditation. It is healthy to let go of the toxic feelings and fretting about something I have no control over. In conclusion, for Lent this year, I am going to try to be cautiously optimistic everyday. If I were to just put optimistic, I would be asking myself to do the impossible, but I can do cautiously optimistic, which is better than no optimism at all.
To find out more...stay tuned.
So this morning I woke up early, putzed online a little bit, to check and see if the overseer had emailed us about the guy coming. There was no email, but I continued to get ready for the day anyway. The original email had mentioned something about the guy showing up sometime around 10am so I wanted to be done getting ready before that. After some breakfast around 9:15am, I decided to go back online to see if Brent (the overseer) had sent anything, and again there was nothing. So I read Wicked for about 2.5 hours and headed to work. The fix-it guy never showed up. This, of course, is not surprising to me because this kind of thing has been happening since we moved into the piece of crap house.
And then as I was walking to the bus today I felt a huge weight being lifted off my shoulders and I realized that I just don't give a flying *expletive* about anything dealing with the house anymore. I have an apartment I can move into on campus starting March 16th and damnit, I'm frickin' moving. I'm done with it all. I'm tired of constantly feeling like crap because of mold allergies. I'm done with it and Thanks Be to God that I only have a little over a month left of it. I won't be able to move the big stuff out until the weekend after the 16th. In my mind as of this very moment, I am no longer at the house, I am gone, going, going, gone. This is going to be a very long month.
In other news:
Jen has moved out and back to Pennsylvania before she heads out on her adventures in Europe. I already miss her very very much. It is sad to see her go and she always has an apartment to stay at when she's in the area. :)
Jason was here this past weekend. It was fabulous. We nailed down our reception site, The Radisson University, which is on Washington Ave. S.E., not University like I wrote before.
Other than that, I'm still waiting for my advisor to sign my independent study sheet so I can turn it into the registrar's office and be considered a student. It has been slightly frustrating, especially since the last day I can turn it in is tomorrow, but I still like how things are going school wise right now. My independent study is going to kick ass! I'm super excited about it, which is great for a change.
I've been thinking about what I should do for Lent. Most people give up something, I usually try to set aside time everyday to meditate, or read the Bible, or just have quiet time with God. This year I'm going to switch it up a bit and give up something. I'm going to give up caring about the goings on at the house, just go with the flow, and do what's best in the end for my health, like move out before the end of March if need be. Of course, this will be done in addition to quiet time and Bible reading and meditation. It is healthy to let go of the toxic feelings and fretting about something I have no control over. In conclusion, for Lent this year, I am going to try to be cautiously optimistic everyday. If I were to just put optimistic, I would be asking myself to do the impossible, but I can do cautiously optimistic, which is better than no optimism at all.
To find out more...stay tuned.
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
WTF!!! What's that in my hair?!
Yesterday as I was getting ready for work, doing my normal routine, combing my fingers through my hair at one point the light in the bathroom hit upon something I did not expect. Ok, I know I'm getting older, but seriously, finding a single silver piece of hair sticking out was not something I wanted to witness at this point in my life. I blame it on my situation at the Seminary, which has mostly been taken care of and just the overabundance of stress living in a place that should really be condemned.
The horror of that one single silver piece of hair coincides with the fact that I looked down at my hands the other day and had no idea whose they were. They are beginning to look old, more elastic and there is extra skin that just shouldn't be that way. Mom, you are right about the mile-stones of getting older, and yes, it freaked me out a bit. I think I'll be more okay with having a piece of silver hair and older looking hands when I get into my 30's. Then it is a tad bit more okay to start showing signs of aging. Ah...the wonders of getting older and starting to look it.
The horror of that one single silver piece of hair coincides with the fact that I looked down at my hands the other day and had no idea whose they were. They are beginning to look old, more elastic and there is extra skin that just shouldn't be that way. Mom, you are right about the mile-stones of getting older, and yes, it freaked me out a bit. I think I'll be more okay with having a piece of silver hair and older looking hands when I get into my 30's. Then it is a tad bit more okay to start showing signs of aging. Ah...the wonders of getting older and starting to look it.
Friday, January 29, 2010
My Meltdown Week...
I've had a hell of a week this week. Actually it all started Saturday when the weather warmed up just enough for the snow and ice to begin melting. We have an ice damn on our roof, actually a couple, but the one that actually caused damage to both the outside and inside of the house is right above the room we use as an office. There is water damage to the room below as well. Nothing has been done to fix these problems but the inspector came to the house today to check it out and is sending out a written notice giving the owner and property manager 30 days to get the work done that needs to be done or she will be fined. So not a vast improvement in the situation at the house, but it's something, leading in the right direction hopefully. On the plus side, I am more pleasant to be around because I'm hopped up on allergy medication 24/7 which makes me loopy. That reminds me, I have to take some more before I go to bed tonight. I just have to keep telling myself, 4 more months, 4 more months, 4 more months, over and over and over again. Otherwise, I'll never make it through the next 4 months.
All about my education:
Aside from the house issues, progress is being made with my educational quagmire. I have a new advisor and though it means that I will have to revise my original topic of concentration for my thesis, I will still get to write about the history of the Palestinian region, including work I have done already on the Medieval Crusading period. Being that my thesis is going to cover a vast period of time, I'm hoping to focus on one country's influence in Palestine, England. So basically from 1095 - to the formation of the state of Israel in 1947 (1948). It will be a general overview of relations between the two regions, religiously, politically, socially, economically. I'm sure I'll have to narrow it down a lot because I only have 100 pages to work with, but this is the basic gist of what I will hopefully be working on starting this spring until I complete my thesis.
I gave up on trying to take the German language exam because it just wasn't working out for me. Instead I am going to take the language exam in French, which is going so much better. I will definitely need a dictionary on hand because I'm a little rusty with the vocabulary, but I remember all of the grammar and quite a bit more vocabulary than I thought I did.
In wedding news:
We have found a reception site. It will be at the Radisson on University in Minneapolis. I am quite excited about this. Jason and I are going to check it out next weekend when he is here. We also have our second pre-marital counseling session that weekend as well. We are going to find out the results of our prepare and enrich tests we had to take. This ought to be interesting.
On the job front:
I got paid today with my check reflecting my new hours and pay (I got a raise) and I am happy to report that I can actually, for the first time in my life, live somewhat comfortably for now. This is good news for my goal of paying off all my bad debt this year, which is very exciting for me. Maybe in the not so distant future I can be bad debt free! That would be pretty awesome.
I'm thinking I need to write down my goals someplace other than my blog. I can't remember all of them when I am trying to write my progress. Next time I blog I will do that, so then I can update you on how I am doing with my other goals I have made for myself this year. For now, I leave you with this...
Do yourself a favor and read the book "World War Z: An Oral History of the Zombie Wars." Trust me, you will not regret it.
P.S. Due to the fact that I am having a hell of a time getting myself motivated to write anything on my Simple Historian blog, I am going to leave it alone for a while. Someday I may start posting on it again, but for now, I'm going to leave it alone.
All about my education:
Aside from the house issues, progress is being made with my educational quagmire. I have a new advisor and though it means that I will have to revise my original topic of concentration for my thesis, I will still get to write about the history of the Palestinian region, including work I have done already on the Medieval Crusading period. Being that my thesis is going to cover a vast period of time, I'm hoping to focus on one country's influence in Palestine, England. So basically from 1095 - to the formation of the state of Israel in 1947 (1948). It will be a general overview of relations between the two regions, religiously, politically, socially, economically. I'm sure I'll have to narrow it down a lot because I only have 100 pages to work with, but this is the basic gist of what I will hopefully be working on starting this spring until I complete my thesis.
I gave up on trying to take the German language exam because it just wasn't working out for me. Instead I am going to take the language exam in French, which is going so much better. I will definitely need a dictionary on hand because I'm a little rusty with the vocabulary, but I remember all of the grammar and quite a bit more vocabulary than I thought I did.
In wedding news:
We have found a reception site. It will be at the Radisson on University in Minneapolis. I am quite excited about this. Jason and I are going to check it out next weekend when he is here. We also have our second pre-marital counseling session that weekend as well. We are going to find out the results of our prepare and enrich tests we had to take. This ought to be interesting.
On the job front:
I got paid today with my check reflecting my new hours and pay (I got a raise) and I am happy to report that I can actually, for the first time in my life, live somewhat comfortably for now. This is good news for my goal of paying off all my bad debt this year, which is very exciting for me. Maybe in the not so distant future I can be bad debt free! That would be pretty awesome.
I'm thinking I need to write down my goals someplace other than my blog. I can't remember all of them when I am trying to write my progress. Next time I blog I will do that, so then I can update you on how I am doing with my other goals I have made for myself this year. For now, I leave you with this...
Do yourself a favor and read the book "World War Z: An Oral History of the Zombie Wars." Trust me, you will not regret it.
P.S. Due to the fact that I am having a hell of a time getting myself motivated to write anything on my Simple Historian blog, I am going to leave it alone for a while. Someday I may start posting on it again, but for now, I'm going to leave it alone.
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
Conscious Effort...
I am making a conscious effort to blog more this year. It is calming for me. I like doing it, so I am going to try. I have set about working on some "goals" for this year and I'll probably keep updating you all on my progress throughout the year.
So far I have been doing well with my goal of paying down my bad debt. I still have a long way to go but progress is being made slowly. Wedding plans are coming along smoothly, still working on the details, like getting music to those who will be playing and singing at the wedding and other various details that go into wedding planning. Being that Jason and I are on a pretty tight budget so we are getting creative, which is fun.
This week is Convocation at Luther Seminary which is awesome because a whole bunch of friends are back in town for a few days. No sleep for me this week! It will be hard to be at work till 5:30 and then take the bus home or to the Seminary. Less time with my peeps. Although not all my peeps are here this week, which saddens me. You are here is spirit my friends.
I had a great meeting today with my advocator. He didn't make any empty promises which is a nice change of pace and he made it very clear that he will advocate for me in any way he can, within reason, which is also awesome. I'm very very cautiously optimistic, which is a vast improvement over even yesterday.
And I will leave you with that because I have to switch computers at work and probably shouldn't be writing this right now anyway. So stay tuned for future and further progress on my "goals" this year and various other ramblings from yours truly. :)
So far I have been doing well with my goal of paying down my bad debt. I still have a long way to go but progress is being made slowly. Wedding plans are coming along smoothly, still working on the details, like getting music to those who will be playing and singing at the wedding and other various details that go into wedding planning. Being that Jason and I are on a pretty tight budget so we are getting creative, which is fun.
This week is Convocation at Luther Seminary which is awesome because a whole bunch of friends are back in town for a few days. No sleep for me this week! It will be hard to be at work till 5:30 and then take the bus home or to the Seminary. Less time with my peeps. Although not all my peeps are here this week, which saddens me. You are here is spirit my friends.
I had a great meeting today with my advocator. He didn't make any empty promises which is a nice change of pace and he made it very clear that he will advocate for me in any way he can, within reason, which is also awesome. I'm very very cautiously optimistic, which is a vast improvement over even yesterday.
And I will leave you with that because I have to switch computers at work and probably shouldn't be writing this right now anyway. So stay tuned for future and further progress on my "goals" this year and various other ramblings from yours truly. :)
Sunday, January 3, 2010
Happy New Year... A Look Back Over 2009...
I'm almost done reading my TIME magazine that looks back over the past year and for that matter the past decade. What I've come to realize is that the 2000's have been like any other decade, lots of bad shit and lots of good shit too. As for my own life, well, there has been a lot of bad shit and a lot of good shit, but I won't get into that now. Now it is time to reflect on the year past, 2009.
2009 started off with a bang. Ok, maybe not a bang, but it was awesome. For New Year's Eve I went out with Carrie Hennesey, Joe Su, and Karen Wallin to Moose Country and we danced the night away with a bunch of strangers, drank cheap champagne at midnight and had a great time. We then proceeded to go back to Carrie's apartment and watch Get Smart. I think I may have been the only one who ended up watching the whole thing. It was a great night.
I did not make any resolutions, but I did decide on a few things I wanted to accomplish or try out in 2009. The first was to work on paying down more of my bad debt that had accrued in 2008. The second was to move closer to the seminary, and the third was to go on a date with someone I actually liked.
As for my first thing on the list, I have been diligently paying down my credit cards, which will still take me a little longer to finish paying off and I have finished paying off my car, which means the money that was going towards my car loan every month can now go to paying credit cards...yeah...
In May, Karen Wallin, Jen Kuntz, and I moved into a piece of shit house in N.E. Minneapolis, which is about 10 to 15 minutes away from the seminary. It's closer than St. Louis Park, but for all the craptacularness this house affords, it might have been a wiser decision to stay where we were or to find something else. Live and learn right?!
And as for the third thing on the list, the one about dating someone I actually like...well you all know what happened with that. I fell in love, am engaged and am getting married September 4, 2010. Who would have thought?! Sure as hell not me, but God had other plans. Thank you God! and AMEN!!! And of course I can't forget: Thank you Jason! You rock my socks off hun!
Okay, aside from setting some, for lack of a better word, "goals" for myself in 2009, there were some rocking awesome times with awesome people that I will never forget. Breaking someone's bed in the dorms of Bockman Hall at Luther Seminary because too many people piled on for a photo op; baseball games, live band karaoke, rock band parties, game nights, trips to MIA and malts afterwards, camping at Lake Itasca State Park; traveling to Maryland and Williamsburg, VA to visit friends and family, visiting Jason in Valpo, Indiana, a wonderful few days in Madison, WI, etc....the great times go on and on.
2009 was also very bittersweet, having to say many good-byes to dear beloved friends, some who will be returning from internship this fall, some who have gone onto new and exciting adventures, many of whom I may never see again. This is a sad prospect; I have never been good at good-byes. But thank God for facebook so I can be updated occasionally on how they are doing and what they are up to in their lives. I love you and miss you all terribly.
Academically, 2009 has been interesting, frustrating and until the last few weeks of the year an utter disappointment. The spring semester was mostly a waste. I did have an independent study on the Islamic Perspective of the Crusades in the Holy Land, which was pretty awesome. Other than that, it was lame. This fall was a complete and utter fucking waste of time and I at one point decided to drop out because no one was willing to help me or gave a damn about helping me out of the crappy situation I found myself in after Dr. Charles got sick at the end of 2008. And so, after almost a full year of bullshit from the seminary, a light appeared at the end of the crap filled tunnel. That light would be the awesome Dr. Granquist. He actually listened to what I was saying and is willing to come up with an actual solution with me to my problem, and if not a solution, at least I have someone to talk to who is willing to listen to me that has some influence to change the situation. Again, Thanks God!
One thing I wish I did more of this past year would have been to spend some more time with my family. Ok, let me rephrase; my parents and my brother. Sadly, much of my family is spread out all over the country so we only see each other on special occasions; for example, my upcoming wedding to the most wonderfully amazing man in the world, Jason Pollington. This year I want to spend more time with them because after May 2011 who knows where we'll be.
So for this year I have given myself "goals" again, some which I will complete happily, others which will be left over from 2009, and others, which I will try to complete but may not and I won't beat myself up about.
Goals:
1) Finish paying off bad debt, or almost all bad debt
2) Plan wedding with Jason and Get married
3) Spend more time with family in the area
4) Be better about staying in touch with family and friends
5) Be more adventurous, don't say never
6) Find solutions to my academic predicament including passing German exam before Fall semester 2010
There are many more things that I will add to the list but these are ones that I will do happily (see number 2, 3, 4 and 6) and some I will try my best to do (see 1 and 5).
So here's to a Happy and Productive New Year! In the words of Forrest Gump, "Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what your going to get." I don't know what 2010 is going to be like; it's only just started. I am looking forward to it though and all that comes with the beginning of a new year. Fresh starts, a new perspective on life, marrying the love of my life, friends, family, good times, hard times, everything. Just Living Life and having new and crazy adventures.
So Stay Tuned...
2009 started off with a bang. Ok, maybe not a bang, but it was awesome. For New Year's Eve I went out with Carrie Hennesey, Joe Su, and Karen Wallin to Moose Country and we danced the night away with a bunch of strangers, drank cheap champagne at midnight and had a great time. We then proceeded to go back to Carrie's apartment and watch Get Smart. I think I may have been the only one who ended up watching the whole thing. It was a great night.
I did not make any resolutions, but I did decide on a few things I wanted to accomplish or try out in 2009. The first was to work on paying down more of my bad debt that had accrued in 2008. The second was to move closer to the seminary, and the third was to go on a date with someone I actually liked.
As for my first thing on the list, I have been diligently paying down my credit cards, which will still take me a little longer to finish paying off and I have finished paying off my car, which means the money that was going towards my car loan every month can now go to paying credit cards...yeah...
In May, Karen Wallin, Jen Kuntz, and I moved into a piece of shit house in N.E. Minneapolis, which is about 10 to 15 minutes away from the seminary. It's closer than St. Louis Park, but for all the craptacularness this house affords, it might have been a wiser decision to stay where we were or to find something else. Live and learn right?!
And as for the third thing on the list, the one about dating someone I actually like...well you all know what happened with that. I fell in love, am engaged and am getting married September 4, 2010. Who would have thought?! Sure as hell not me, but God had other plans. Thank you God! and AMEN!!! And of course I can't forget: Thank you Jason! You rock my socks off hun!
Okay, aside from setting some, for lack of a better word, "goals" for myself in 2009, there were some rocking awesome times with awesome people that I will never forget. Breaking someone's bed in the dorms of Bockman Hall at Luther Seminary because too many people piled on for a photo op; baseball games, live band karaoke, rock band parties, game nights, trips to MIA and malts afterwards, camping at Lake Itasca State Park; traveling to Maryland and Williamsburg, VA to visit friends and family, visiting Jason in Valpo, Indiana, a wonderful few days in Madison, WI, etc....the great times go on and on.
2009 was also very bittersweet, having to say many good-byes to dear beloved friends, some who will be returning from internship this fall, some who have gone onto new and exciting adventures, many of whom I may never see again. This is a sad prospect; I have never been good at good-byes. But thank God for facebook so I can be updated occasionally on how they are doing and what they are up to in their lives. I love you and miss you all terribly.
Academically, 2009 has been interesting, frustrating and until the last few weeks of the year an utter disappointment. The spring semester was mostly a waste. I did have an independent study on the Islamic Perspective of the Crusades in the Holy Land, which was pretty awesome. Other than that, it was lame. This fall was a complete and utter fucking waste of time and I at one point decided to drop out because no one was willing to help me or gave a damn about helping me out of the crappy situation I found myself in after Dr. Charles got sick at the end of 2008. And so, after almost a full year of bullshit from the seminary, a light appeared at the end of the crap filled tunnel. That light would be the awesome Dr. Granquist. He actually listened to what I was saying and is willing to come up with an actual solution with me to my problem, and if not a solution, at least I have someone to talk to who is willing to listen to me that has some influence to change the situation. Again, Thanks God!
One thing I wish I did more of this past year would have been to spend some more time with my family. Ok, let me rephrase; my parents and my brother. Sadly, much of my family is spread out all over the country so we only see each other on special occasions; for example, my upcoming wedding to the most wonderfully amazing man in the world, Jason Pollington. This year I want to spend more time with them because after May 2011 who knows where we'll be.
So for this year I have given myself "goals" again, some which I will complete happily, others which will be left over from 2009, and others, which I will try to complete but may not and I won't beat myself up about.
Goals:
1) Finish paying off bad debt, or almost all bad debt
2) Plan wedding with Jason and Get married
3) Spend more time with family in the area
4) Be better about staying in touch with family and friends
5) Be more adventurous, don't say never
6) Find solutions to my academic predicament including passing German exam before Fall semester 2010
There are many more things that I will add to the list but these are ones that I will do happily (see number 2, 3, 4 and 6) and some I will try my best to do (see 1 and 5).
So here's to a Happy and Productive New Year! In the words of Forrest Gump, "Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what your going to get." I don't know what 2010 is going to be like; it's only just started. I am looking forward to it though and all that comes with the beginning of a new year. Fresh starts, a new perspective on life, marrying the love of my life, friends, family, good times, hard times, everything. Just Living Life and having new and crazy adventures.
So Stay Tuned...
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