Gluten-Free...

I love all things bread!  Bagels, English muffins, cereal, homemade sandwich thins, pizza, donuts, and any manner of carbtastic desserts!

But lately over the last few months, I have been dealing with some bloating and inflammation, which can be side effects of gallbladder removal.  And so, I am slowly working my way to becoming gluten free.  All signs point to gluten as the irritant, which of course, is devastating for me because of my love for all things carb related.

I am being proactive though and searching for equivalent recipes and products to what I love but gluten free.  I will have to get used to the different taste of the new recipes.  It will be more expensive to make certain things like our homemade bread because we'll have to use an alternative flour source.

In the end though, I know it will be worth it.  It will be worth not having the big inflamed bulge in my stomach and abdominal areas.  It will be worth it to fit in my clothes again and to not feel self-conscious every time I go out in public.  It will be worth it to feel good on the inside again, with less gas build up and aches and pains.

I am making this leap into the unknown for myself so I can feel better in every way possible; so I can be more present for my family and friends and so I can fit into my clothes again!

Wish me luck, as this is going to be hard; one of the hardest things I have done in a long time. 

Until next time!

Megan

What is Light?

As I sit here on the heating radiator in front of one of my dining room windows, I can't help being fascinated by the shadows of the leaves and tree branches playing across the table.

My youngest has caught a gunky sinus cold from who knows what and he is coughing in the background, lounging on our big round chair watching something on his tablet.  That little stinker bought figured out how to buy a movie on Amazon Prime Video on his tablet.  But that is a story for another time.

Back to the light.  What I am using as a devotional each day had a poem about light that I read for yesterday that I want to share with you because it speaks so much to light in our daily lives and God's light given to us by the words of Jesus Christ, through the Holy Spirit.

Poetry can be an amazing vehicle to discuss faith, when given thought and discernment to the words and context of the idea that is being conveyed.  Don't believe me, check out the books of Psalms, Proverbs, Ecclesiastes, Lamentations and if your Bible has it Songs of Solomon.  Each of these biblical books are written in poetic as well a prophetic form.  I encourage you to rummage around in these books when you can take a moment to do so.  They have all kinds of amazing little nuggets about living a daily life of faith in the good and bad times.

May this poem on, For Light, bring light into your life on this Tuesday, September 10th, 2019.

Until Next Time,

Megan

John O'Donohue, To Bless the Space Between Us: A Book of Blessings. Doubleday.  New York, New York.  2008. 15-16.

For Light

Light cannot see inside things.
That is what the dark is for:
Minding the interior,
Nurturing the path of growth
Through places where death
In its own way turns into life.

In the glare of neon times,
Let our eyes not be worn
By surfaces that shine
With hunger made attractive.

That our thoughts may be true light,
Finding their way into words
Which have the weight of shadow
To hold the layers of truth.

That we never place our trust
In minds claimed by empty light,
Where one-sided certainties
Are driven by false desire.

When we look into the heart,
May our eyes have the kindness
And reverence of candlelight.

That the searching of our minds
Be equal to the oblique
Crevices and corners where
The mystery continues to dwell,
glimmering in fugitive light.

When we are confined inside
The dark house of suffering
That moonlight might find a window.

When we become false and lost
That the severe noon-light
Would cast our shadow clear.

When we love, that dawn-light
Would lighten our feet
Upon the waters.

As we grow old, that twilight
Would illuminate treasure
In the fields of memory.

And when we come to search for God,
Let us first be robed in night,
Put on the mind of morning
To feel the rush of light
Spread slowly inside
The color and stillness
Of a world found.

Musings on New Beginnings.....What does that even mean?

I recently started reading a Book of Blessings about different stages and areas of life; a new devotion if you will.  It is called, To Bless the Space Between Us: A Book of Blessings, by John O'Donohue.  He has written quite a few books of poetry based on old Irish ways of thinking and literature and uses them to express ideas about life's journey and ways that blessings play a significant role in our daily lives.

I have recently finished a devotion series using Facebook Messenger to do it as a group with twenty or so ladies.  This devotion was called, 100 Days to Brave, by Annie F. Downs.  After finishing this group devotion over 100 days, I was decided to keep doing a devotion in the mornings to start my day off on a good note.  The rest of the day may suck, but at least I gave myself some time in the morning to get in a decent head space before the chaos of being a stay-at-home mom of two highly sensitive, speech delayed boys.

Today as I started my new devotional series by John O'Donohue, we read about New Beginnings.  New Beginnings are a part of life; they can be joyous and scary at the same time.  And they can be a blessing, depending on the circumstances surrounding said new beginning.

The question he posed at the end of his reflection to this New Beginnings section was this:

What is the new horizon in you that wants to be seen?

This is an significant question for me because it has been something I have asking myself for years.  What IS the new horizon in me that wants to be seen?  Looking back now, thinking about this question, I can see how with each new beginning, each new horizon in my life, there was equal parts excitement and fear of the new; joy and terror in facing the unknown.

I don't know what the new horizon in me that wants to be seen is yet.  I have just accepted after close to 8 and 1/2 years my role of being a wife and mom; not being exactly where I thought I wanted to be at age 37, not fulfilling my calling as a historian, not helping my family out as much financially as I want to be.  I have several fancy Masters degrees that we are paying loans on and I am doing nothing with them right now.  I spend my days working on potty training our 3 - almost - 4 year old, trying to be a supportive spouse and raising two highly sensitive children, which is no small feat.  I struggle to live in the chaos of the moment, while knowing that a new horizon is bursting to be sent forth from me.

It is hard for me to reflect on new beginnings when for so long I have put everyone else's needs before my own.  I am afraid to shake things up to start my own personal new beginning.  And yet, I am also excited to start a new personal beginning, that can lead me into a place of purpose within my vocational call and to see how it will benefit not just me but everyone around me.

Until next time!

-Megan.