Write What You Know...

Recently, I have been discerning about going back to work outside of the home.  I am pregnant so it would not be until after baby boy is born, more likely at least a year after baby boy is born, as was my original intent with our oldest son.  But living where we do, I could not find a job that would pay enough to make it worth working outside the home.  I have been a stay at home mom since our first son was born in August 2012. 

I have liked staying at home and being the one to raise our son with my husband who is a pastor in a small rural town in what is referred to as North Central Montana.  But I often feel very isolated most days.  Being a city gal in a small rural town has been a challenge.  I am often at a loss for things to do and places to go with our son that don't require driving long distances or spending money.  I am thankful that our son is easily entertained by a trip to the town park or a walk around town.  Otherwise things would really be tough.

The idea of working outside the home is appealing for a couple of reasons.  For one thing, it would force me to leave the house.  Getting out of the house is a lifeline for me.  Even if I don't see anyone, the fresh air and nature are reviving.  But it would be nice to interact with more people, even for a few moments at a time depending on the work I do.  Another thing that makes working outside the home appealing is the second income.  With how bogged down we are in student loan debt these days any and all extra income will be helpful.

Then there is another part of me that loves staying at home with our son, soon to be sons.  I love the fact that I am raising my kids along with my husband.  I love the flexible schedule and not having to accrue time off or lose a days pay because we decide to go somewhere as a family.  The big downside is figuring out how to sanely live on one income with all of our student loan debt.

For the time being I'll be staying at home with our sons.  So what to do then about my anxiety about money?  Well, we have a budget that I meticulously keep track of every month.  I am also looking at work from home options but with my time constraints it is hard to find options that pay well and are flexible time wise. 

One option that I keep coming across is to monetize my blog, which I have already done, or to write what you know and self publish on Amazon.  I love to write and blog, so I am going to see where I can go with this option.  Writing about what I know and sharing those things with others will be an interesting experiment in time management, but I am going to give it a shot.  Maybe I will be successful and I will be able to continue to stay home with the kiddos and alleviate some of my anxiety about money at the same time. 

I have a lot of work to do to get started, so I better get started. 

Week 27 of Healthier Living in 2015

7/22/2015
For week 27: 7/15 - 7/22/2015
Weigh in Weight:  160.8 lbs
Previous weigh in weight on 7/15: 161.2 lbs. lose of 4 oz

I met with a diabetes specialist on Tuesday, 7/21 and we worked out a comprehensive sane strategy for me to follow to keep my gestational diabetes under control for the rest of my pregnancy.  Every day I have to write down everything I eat and count my carbs.  I have to check my blood right away in the morning when I get up and two hours after I eat breakfast, lunch and dinner.  I was suggested that I go for a 10-15 minute walk sometime during the two hours after I eat my main meals of the day to help regulate my blood sugar levels.  I have been going for walks and they are working to keep my blood sugars at a good level.  I don't have to take insulin yet, and it looks like diet and exercise are working really well so far for me.  I'm praying this trend continues the rest of my pregnancy.

Okay, now for my goals for week 27.  I worked on and completed all of the goals I set for myself for the week.  I even found time to write in my journal two times during the week.  I was able to speed walk on the treadmill one day during the week too.  I continue to drink at least 80 oz of water a day which helps keep the water retention and constipation at bay.

Overall, I am in good spirits and am feeling good.

This is a short post this week, as I don't have much more to add to it at this time.

For week 28, I plan to work on some of the financial goals I want to accomplish by the end of the year.  I at least want to get started on some of the projects I have in mind.  Hopefully I succeed in my endeavors, but if not, I'll feel good about trying something new.

Goals for week 28: 7/22 - 7/29/2015
1)  Set up an auction on facebook for the mudroom shoe rug I finished and the scarves I plan to crochet.
2)  Finish crocheting at least one scarf to put up on facebook auction.
3)  Come up with a logo for my products so people know they were made by me.
4)  Come up with a local marketing plan for my book (goal is to sell through all avenues available at least 2,500 books)

My Toddler vs. Crowds

Today one of the churches in our parish Grace Lutheran Church is celebrating its 75th Anniversary.  With a tired toddler, we headed over to the church a little before the service to help set up last minute things.

And then my son imploded.  Note to anyone who is not the parent of said toddler, don't make ridiculous demands or drag them around to areas they don't want to go and not expect a complete meltdown, especially when said toddler is growing, active and exhausted.  Just leave him or her the hell alone.

Okay, rant over.

And so after spending 15 minutes trying to calm him down in the dark church office, I made the decision to take him home.  Thank the Lord that the parsonage we live in is right across the street from the church. 

After getting home, my son went into a calm down timeout in his room for a few minutes until I felt he had calmed down enough for me to rejoin him.  We then talked (did I mention that he has speech issues so he has a hard time communicating verbally?  He'll be starting speech therapy at our local school this school year which hopefully helps him feel less frustrated with life.), we read a few stories and he fell asleep during the last one.  I took advantage of the situation and took a much needed nap myself.

Needless to say, this Pastor's spouse is slacking in her spousal duties to be present at the 75th Anniversary celebration.  I am still laying in bed with my son as he is snuggled up right next to me and finger typing this post on my droid phone at this very moment.

One thing about my son is that he gets overwhelmed when people get in his face (don't we all?!) but he can't verbally communicate is a polite way to tell someone to back off and let him be.  Speech therapy is going to do him wonders.  It is just so painful for me to watch him get so frustrated with himself because he has such a hard time communicating verbally. 

And so, I am sloughing off my pastor's spouse duties today to be with my son.  It would have been nice to participate in the celebration a little bit today, but getting snuggles from my kiddo and doing what little I can to help him while he deals with his communication and general other toddler problems, is much more important to me right now. 

If people are sad about us not being there then I am flattered because it means my son and I are missed.  If they are upset because they expect my son and I to be there because we are the pastor's family, they will just have to get over it.  I will always do what is best for my family first and this time it was to be at home with my son who needed a nap and for my husband not to have to worry about us on this day of celebration that he is a very active participant in.

My toddler doesn't like to be in large crowds of people, so I typically miss out on a lot of things especially church related activities to help him through his meltdowns.  It makes me feel really lonely at times because the adult interaction is a lifeline for me, but my son comes first, so we carry on and make the best of a tough situation. 

I thank God everyday for my family.  But when it comes to my toddler son vs. crowds, my son wins the battle very time.

Week 26 of Healthier Living in 2015

7/15/2015
For week 26: 7/8 - 7/15/2015
Weigh in Weight: 161.2 lbs
Previous weigh in weight for 7/8: 161.2 lbs gain of 0 lbs

Well it looks like I made it half way through my year long journey of healthier living in 2015.  It has not been easy.  I have prayed many times about why I even started this whole thing in the first place.  This journey has been a blessing and a curse.

The blessings of this journey are:
1) feelings of accomplishment when I complete a goal I set for myself
2) being healthier physically, emotionally and mentally or working on ways to be healthier in these areas
3) persistence and resilience through tough weeks when I have wanted to quit
4) prayer and deepening my understanding of my faith.  This kind of year long journey is not for the weak and I pray often to God to keep me going on this path to living a healthier and more meaningful lifestyle.

The curses of this journey are:
1) remembering and making the time to blog weekly about how I'm doing with my goals and in general during the previous week
2) sometimes it feels like just one more thing I have to do each week.  There are some weeks that I barely have time to think about myself because my husband has a lot going on and I have to take care of my extremely active toddler son.
3) to expand on #2, I get overwhelmed by the whole thing and sometimes I just don't feel like blogging one week.  I am getting better about it though, especially since we aren't travelling as much right now.

Looking now and the blessings and curses of this process, I see that there are far more blessings and benefits, which propel me to continue on this crazy year long journey I set for myself back in January.

On Friday, July 10th, I took the 1 hour glucose test to determine if I have gestational diabetes again.  I failed that one and went in again on Monday, July 13th to take the 3 hour test.  And since I am not posting this blog like I should have on Wednesday, I can write here that yesterday, Thursday, July 16th, I got a call that I was being referred to a diabetes specialist because I have gestational diabetes.

I am upset of course; not so much about the diet and exercise part.  I will have to write down everything I eat thereby counting my carbs.  It's a pain in the ass, but nothing compared to having to check my blood and possibly have to do insulin with it again.  That was the worst part, the shots several times a day.

And so, I now wait to find out when my appointment with the specialist will and figure out the best course of action to get me and baby through the rest of this pregnancy in a healthy way physically, emotionally and mentally.

As for my goals for week 26, I accomplished all of them to the best of my ability.  I worked on and completed all of my concrete goals for writing in my journal at least twice during the week, I filled half my plate at meals with fruits and/or vegetables and I started planning and working on some side projects that will hopefully bring in some extra money to our household.  I need to work on eating healthier snacks mid-morning and in the afternoon, but now that I will be put on a special diet, I won't have any other option.  One good thing about gestational diabetes is the specific diet that baby and I are going to be on.  It helps us maintain healthy weights as well as forces us to have only healthy food and watch portion sizes.

I really want to get back into speed walking on the treadmill while watching episodes of General Hospital again.  It has been months since I have been able to do it, either because I wasn't feeling well earlier in my pregnancy or because we have been so busy.  I do have the option of getting up really early in the morning and working out then, or waiting until later at night after my son goes to bed to work out, but I value my sleep too much to give it up.  One of these days I am going to kick my husband and son out of the house by 10am and do my speed walking.  I need to start getting some really good sweat exercising in, especially now with my gestational diabetes.  Again, it sucks having it, but in a way it is also a blessing because it is going to force my family and I to make exercising and diet a priority again.  For almost 2 months it has gone by the wayside because of many different reasons, all excuses and poor at that for the most part.  So now we have to change our way of thinking again and make it a priority for all of us.  In the end, it will be a very good thing.

Life is certainly one crazy journey and I have added to it with my healthier living year long journey in 2015.  I will continue on this journey with the blessings and the curses.  Until next time, Keep on keeping on!

Goals for week 27:  7/15 - 7/22/2015
1) Write in my journal at least once a week
2) Speed walking on the treadmill at least once during the week
3) Make sure to drink at least 80 oz of water a day
4) Meet with a diabetes specialist and come up with a reasonable plan for the rest of my pregnancy that will be healthy for baby and I physically, emotionally and mentally

Week 25 of Healthier Living in 2015

7/8/2015
For week 25: 7/3 - 7/8-2015
Weigh in Weight: 161.2 lbs
Previous weigh in weight on 7/3: 163.7 lbs

I decided for one of my goals in my last post that I needed to make more realistic goals that I can fulfill for week 25.  And I did!

My husband and I sat down together one afternoon and re-did our budget for 2015.  We also came up with a debt tackling strategy.  It will take some time, but I believe it is realistic and achievable.  One of my new goals after looking at our budget is to find a way to make some side money to help us out financially.  I have some pretty good ideas besides my books sales (will post more about my book later) that could potentially be lucrative in some manor.

So having reworked our budget for 2015, I was able to focus on my other two goals for week 25.  I drank 80-100 oz of water a day and wrote in my journal at least once during the week.  It was actually only once and should really bump it up to at least two time a week because writing in my journal really helps me process my thoughts.

I fulfilled my goals and feel really good emotionally and mentally.  I now need to work on the physical part.  Our schedule has really gotten off balance and I hardly have time to myself in the mornings anymore to do my speed walking on the treadmill, which is the best work out for me since I am pregnant and am restricted in some of the exercising I can do.  I basically have to choose between getting a little more sleep in the morning or getting up early to go down to the basement and exercise.  I've chosen to rest and sleep.

Therefore, my goals for week 26 are going to focus on healthier eating habits and making sure I get daily exercise and activity into each day.  This week I am focusing more on my physical health, but also continue to work on my emotional and mental health too.  Physically activity and a healthy diet for me tend to go hand in hand with not only feeling better physically but also emotionally and mentally.  Until next week:  Keep on keeping on!

Goals for week 26:  7/8 - 7/15/2015
1)  Fill half my plate with fruits and vegetables at meal times
2)  Eat healthy snacks mid-morning and in the afternoon
3)  Write in my journal at least twice during the week
4)  Start planning and working on some side projects to make some extra money to put towards our debt tackling strategy.

Weeks 23 and 24 of Healthier Living in 2015

7/3/2015
For weeks 23 and 24: 6/17 - 7/3/2015
Weigh in Weight:

With the end of Vacation Bible School and going on a trip for a 9 days to Minnesota to visit my family and friends, I have not taken the time to blog or frankly pay too much attention to my healthier living goals.  VBS ended on June 19th and we left for Minnesota on June 22nd, getting back on July 1st.  We drove there and back which meant long hours in the car over two days.  My legs are hating me right now.  Let's just say my water retention is an issue and so was constipation on and off the last two weeks.  Some days were better than others.

I worked hard to make sure I drank 80-100 oz of water a day the last two weeks, and most days I succeeded. :)  I wore compression socks when I needed to, which helped keep down the swelling in my legs.  I got what exercise I could, which was far more than I thought I'd get during our trip.  I also put my feet up and relaxed too.  My eating habits need some work though.  I ate more salty food than I should have, which made me retain more water.  I have a lot of excess water weight that I need to deal with now.  My goal is to get rid of most of my excess water weight that doesn't have to do with my pregnancy.

We are traveling again tomorrow to go camping tomorrow and most of the day on Saturday.  We have to be back Saturday night because of church service on Sunday morning.  So again, most sitting around, probably eating and heat.  I am going to work really hard not to eat much junk food and just stick to the healthy stuff.  I'm going to make sure I get 80-100 oz of water to drink because it is going to be ridiculously hot outside.  And when the sun goes down or isn't so hot in the evening, I am going to walk around to get some exercise.

One of my goals starting today, 7/3, is to get back into setting and fulfilling weekly healthier living goals.  This includes making time to blog weekly and journal once a week.  I need to get back into it.  I'm almost half way done with my year long journey, why stop now?!

I will tell you this though, I have wanted to quit many times.  It's just one more thing to do.  I have very limited free time to myself and sitting in front of my laptop, is not at the top of my list of things to do during that free time.  But I started this with a few major goals: to be a physically, emotionally and mentally healthier person for myself, my family and my friends.  Before starting this journey, I prayed to God about it.  Was this something I had the time to do?  And then I thought, if I'm not a healthy person, how will I be able to fully give of my time and talents to others around me?  I couldn't.  And so I embarked on this crazy journey to live and be healthier in 2015.  Now I have to stick with it.  So, until my next post, Keep on keeping on!

Goals for Week 25: 7/3 - 7/8/2015
1) Set realistic goals and work to fulfill them
2) Drink 80-100 oz of water a day
3) Journal at least one time during the week
4) Create a budget and debt tackling strategy with my husband for the rest of 2015 - April 2016
5) Get daily exercise or do some sort of physical activity